Closer to Free

Well 2008, it looks like your time is up. I will always love you for being the year that brought us Morgan but it seems that there are a whole bunch of folks looking forward to watching you slip away tonight.

This is my very favorite "see you later stupid year" song.



I will be back to real blogging next week. Until then, have a safe and happy New Year. 2009 is going to be just fine.

itinerary

My schedule these days goes something like this:

wake up late
lay in bed and think about warm i am
get up
talk to my mom
shower
talk to my mom
drive somewhere for lunch with someone awesome
goof around
eat dinner with a collection of people that are awesome
sit around and talk
go to bed late

Throw in some presents, a haircut, and some What Not to Wear and that's been my vacation. So. Awesome.

Tonight I was catching up on neglected email and this was the message from SteepandCheap sometime this week

The worst part about the downturn in the economy is that everyone is blaming it for anything that goes wrong. I suppose that if you're among the 7% of the workforce that's unemployed, then you'd disagree that the blame game is the worst part, but I suspect that it makes things even less bearable. I've heard "economic downturn" prefaced by bad news so many times that I'm pretty sure people would blame the economy if the building was on fire. The really crazy thing is that it's not that the economy is completely going downhill--it's that it's just not growing rapidly enough. I've listened to the NPR stories and, although I'm no economist, I think I can safely say that I have no idea what's going on. The only thing worse than people blaming the economy for all their problems are those people who try to tell you that it's your responsibility to go out and spend a lot of money. If I was to jump in and blame the economic downturn for just one thing, I would say that it's made me want to sleep more and be lazy--or maybe I'm thinking of winter.

So I'm just letting you all know that my lack of posting this week is totally because of the economic downturn.

stop

I am still tallying the results of the contest but I've been signifigantly distracted.

Lost in Translation*

*See yesterday's post for below to make sense.

A little known fact is that Replikate was almost called "just like honey" . This song had got yearning guitars, radical lyrics, and while I know it won't be everyone's cup of tea, it always makes me want to go out and get good and kissed.

Give it a listen and then go to Dainon's blog to hear his nomination.



May the best song win!

Duel

So I had so much fun with the "My Song is Better Then Your Song" post last week that I challenged my music guru friend Dainon to an audio duel of our very own. We have both picked a song and will post it on our blogs. Listen to mine, hop over to his and then leave your vote in one of the comment sections. And who knows, maybe you can be the next challenger!

We'll be posting after midnight Mountain Standard Time. That's right, the time zone we will both be in tomorrow (look at me blogging not packing! Woot!).

Vote!

Holding all the Fines

I had a pretty ridiculously fun weekend.

Through a series of random events, Brenda and I ended up at the Vince Gill/Amy Grant Christmas Concert and got into the Meet and Greet afterwards. Before you completely dismiss my musical tastes, there are two voices that said Christmas in our house growing up and they belonged to Nat King Cole and Amy Grant. So when free tickets dropped in my lap, my 12 year old self couldn't WAIT to hear "Tennessee Christmas" by someone other then my little sister and me. We had a great time and ended up singing along to every Christmas song in my iPod on the way home. Every Christmas song and Beyonce's "Single Ladies."

I went to see Black Nativity with Seth, Matt, Brian and Brian's adorable mom. I'm telling you, nothing gets you in the Christmas spirit like a full Gospel Choir singing "Go Tell It On The Mountain" and asking if you BELIEVE in Jesus. It was fantastic.

I danced my head off at the ward Christmas Gala. I was kind of eye rolly about going because sometimes nothing makes my life feel like a bigger failure then dances in the Church gym at 32 years old. But the combination of getting all dressed up (which i love!) , a fun group of people deciding to suck it up and go and the DJ agreeing to the one two punch of "Livin' on a Prayer" and "Don't Stop Believing" meant I ended up having a stellar time.





The highlight though was finally getting to see Bon Iver live. I've raved about this guy before but now having heard pretty much the whole album in person it's going to be years before I can shut up about him. The story goes that a couple of years ago, Justin Vernon had just broken up with his lady, split with his band and gotten pretty sick. So he headed up to his Dad's hunting cabin in nowhere Wisconsin to try to pull himself back together.

He ended up writing an album up there all by his little self and it's become one of my all time favorites. I heard him for the first time the weekend I moved to Boston and so it has felt like a soundtrack to my year here. I was super excited about the show but completely unprepared for how emotional it would make me. About 10 seconds into the first song it was like a dam broke inside me and I started to cry. A guy holed up in a cabin writing about his broken heart is definitely a first world kind of sob story but there is no doubt about the pain he was feeling when he wrote this record. But it's also leaves you feeling surprisingly peaceful. I sat in the dark and closed my eyes and let the music work out some of the knots I've let myself get into this year. Vernon himself was really friendly and charming and seemed genuinely humbled by the amount of attention he's gotten from this record. The audience was so well behaved that on the really quiet songs I almost couldn't hear anyone breathing. It was a really lovely concert experience and definitely a highlight of what was a pretty outstanding weekend.

Here's a new song he played last night called Blood Bank. It cuts off kind of weird at the end but I love these lyrics

then the snow started falling
we were stuck out in your car
you were rubbing both my hands
chewing on a candybar

saying it was just like a present
to be showing up right here
as the moon waned to crescent
we started to kiss

Blood Bank

And then this is the MP3version of the "Skinny Love" video I've posted before. Listen carefully to the part where he hits these lyrics

I told you to be patient
I told you to be fine
I told you to be balanced
I told you to be kind
Now all your love is wasted?
Then who the hell was I?

because if the way he sings that last line doesn't break your heart just a little bit then I don't know if you even have one
Skinny Love

Oh music, I love you so much.

The Great Debate

I like the radio. There. I said it. I know music snobs loooove to hate on the radio and yeah there are lots of big conglomerates who own cookie cutter stations and radio tends to be about a hundred years slower then the blogs and blah blah blabidy blah.

Well I still like it and if you are patient, you can find good stations in pretty much every city. I especially enjoy a good morning show. Plenty of them are complete fests of suck but when you hit the right one it can make the drive to work so much more pleasant.

There is a station here in Boston that has such a morning show and every Thursday they do a segment called "My Song is Better Then Your Song". Two contestants each submit a song, any song, and then listeners vote. It's fun because even though it's an "alternative" station, they choose songs from all different genres and time periods. Today's contest was pretty good and I am as of yet undecided about the winner.

First up was a classic Joy Division song from the 80's that is so sad but so so awesome. I was pretty sure there was no way anyone could beat this song.



But then the reigning champion brought this. It's a Christmas song that I've heard a bazillion times by a bunch of different artist but never the original. Holy eff! Please can we have 60's girl groups back? This voice!


So I am still torn. What do you guys think?

Blurg

When I went in for that massage a couple of weeks ago, the therapist recommended that I come in 2-3 more times in the next few weeks if I really wanted to get rid of my knot. This weekend I went for my second treatment. I like to call it "treatment" because then it doesn't sound like I am some jerk getting weekly massages now. Because while it does feel soooo good, the whole reason I went in the first time was because the giant knot was causing practically the entire right side of my body to go on strike. I have always enjoyed massage but I'm becoming converted to it's medical legitimacy as well.

This week we started face up to try to open up my shoulders a little bit and get me to stop hunching forward all the time like I do when I am at the computer or driving or sitting on my couch making up things to worry about. So the therapist is sitting behind me, working my shoulders and my neck and then he holds my head up with one hand and lifts my back with the other hand to get to the knot. And then he starts kind of laughing and says, "seriously though, re-lax. I've got you, and it's only about three inches if you fall anyway." You know you have got a problem when you are PAYING someone to work the tension out of your body and you still can't seem to chill.

Fortunately that was early in the hour and I was able to concentrate on loosening up (I'm sure this means I need therapy) and I am feeling like we are making real progress. I've been draping myself over the stability ball every night before bed and I can feel an actual difference in the way I stand and sit. But I am a tense little person, and I worry way too much about things that really don't need to take up precious real estate in my brain-especially now that they are deciding to take over my whole body as well. So if anyone has brilliant ideas about how to let. it. go. well, I'm anxiously waiting ; )

Here's an old favorite on the subject. One loaded with memories of this city of mine the last go 'round no less...

Presents

My friend Dainon likes to send Christmas music out during the month of December. Since he has amazing taste and a knack for finding things I might not ever run across I really look forward to hearing what he finds.

This one is quite sweet.


*link fixed*

Art and Life

Tonight I'm watching TV with commercials which I rarely do in this TiVo world but I've been a sicky and haven't gotten very far from the couch all day.

An ad came on for some horrible looking movie where a recently divorced and may I say haggard looking but we are supposed to think h-a-w-t Heather Locklear goes on an island vacation and gets it on with a guy half her age thus getting her groove back or blah blah blah. The name of the movie was "Flirting with Forty" and this is exactly what went through my head.

"Heather Locklear is supposed to be 40 in this movie? And it's remarkable that a young hot guy falls for her? I'M TOTALLY GOING TO BE FORTY!!"

And then I heard Billy Crystal's voice in my ear "When?" so I answered "someday." and then had a real craving for a little When Harry Met Sally.

p.s. yeah, I know, I'm nowhere near 40. But welcome to the mysterious inner workings of the female brain.

Breakdown

A few weeks ago I was taking a shower like I often do at 10:30 on a Thursday night. I was reaching up to put conditioner in my hair and felt a pain in my shoulder that hurt so much I actually yelled. My roommate knocked on the door because um, I so rarely scream in the shower. I managed to get myself out and dressed but the evening ended with me in tears on the couch while Brenda tried to work on the knot in my back that I've been ignoring since it showed up this summer.

So I made an appointment at a place that specializes in real live clinical massage. It. Was. Fantastic. She spent the entire hour just working on my blasted knot. It was definitely one of those hurts so good massages where you kind of want to punch your therapist in the face though. And at one point she said, "I don't mean this critically but you certainly have a lot of tension in your neck." Yes lady, that's what happens when you tensed up when you were about eight and have never really learned to let it go. She told me that since I spend so much time at a desk or hunched over a computer, I should counter that with some time every day rolling around on my back on one of those big stability balls. And guess what? It feels pretty awesome.

I love bodies. I think they are so amazing. And for as much time as I spend this summer thinking about what I put into my body I sort of forgot about the other ways I need to take care of it. I guess my body decided to remind me by freaking out a little bit.

Early New Year's Resolution. More working out, less hunching. (I'm totally sitting up straight and tall while I write this people.)

Treat

Seriously, he's like kryptonite. I am so powerless.

Winner

All good things must come to an end and the goofing around and sleeping in and hanging out of the last few days is pretty much over. Well, at least for the three weeks until I sit on my mother's couch for 10 days holding Morgan (I hope his parents don't mind me kidnapping him.)

But the weekend IS ending on a high note. My friend reminded me of this gem of a song that I had forgotten ALL about. It's really too bad MJ went off the crazy deep end because really-do they make them like this anymore? There might have been a dance party in my kitchen...

Pilgrim

This is the first Thanksgiving in many, many years that I will not be spending with any member of my family. Last year I bought a last minute ticket home after the thought of being without them was just too sad but that is a much easier thing to do from California then it is from Massachusetts. So tomorrow I will spend the holiday with some newish and some oldish friends and I'm sure it will be lovely. I get to cook some fun things tomorrow and I have a massage and a Celtics game planned for Friday so honestly, I have few complaints about a long weekend mostly to myself.

My brain is sort of a jumble these days. A few weeks ago I was explaining to someone how I wasn't sure if I was in the right career and he said something about my job sounding like something the protagonist in a chick flick would have and I guess he's sort of right. I haven't been able to shake the feeling that no one who dropped in on my life would be able to figure out why the eff I've been struggling so much this year. I have a good job in a scary economic time, I have a cute apartment and an easy roommate, I live in a nice city that is big without being overwhelming, I'm finding some good friends, I have plenty of really cute shoes. And yet. Having my sister here this weekend was blissful but it gets harder and harder to put the people I love on planes and watch them go away. And I do feel restless. There is just no getting around it. I don't know where the line is between being awfully grateful for the life you have-and I mean really, legitimately thankful for all the chances you've been given and the opportunities that practically land in your lap-and wondering if you could be doing more/better/different if you were just braver or stronger. I suppose I am trying to learn the difference between being content with where you are and paying attention to when you are being pushed to do something else. Gosh it's fun to grow!!

All seriousness aside, if my little sister ever asks to visit you, say yes. You will have f-u-n. Check it...
Jumping for joy at The Breakers
What are the odds that Callie and Carl would be in town the same weekend???
Or that Traci and the famous Di would come up from NYC?
We ate the heck out of some cookies.
Emily and B the fashion queens.
Not telling.

Happy Thanksgiving peeps.

Repeat

This weekend Emily and I made a trek to H&M so she could buy pants for all those poor kids in Salt Lake without a giant Swedish fashion house on every corner. I was picking out some tights when I got a text from my brother Sterling.

A picture text.

Of an ultrasound.

I ran over to Emily who already knew and promptly started to cry while I called the proud soon-to-be parents. So yeah, we were the family with no babies for a long long time and now Morgan is getting a cousin his very own age. Turns out all my fears about whether the second would be as exciting as the first were unfounded.

Sterling and Megan are totally dope. This is one lucky little kiddo.

Sister Sister

There are many, many reasons it is wonderful to have my sister Emily around. We eat Christmas balls and drink Dr. Pepper and laugh the same laugh, she helps me put together the things in my closet in ways I would never think about and tonight she even helped me do this.

it's been an awesome weekend.

Eggs

I am having dinner tonight with a friend who was so dead set against having kids that last month when she asked me to guess who was pregnant I threw out 10 celeb names before she finally said all exasperated "it's me!!". And although I completely respect those couples who decide children aren't for them, my heart skipped a beat for them and for the world. They are just the kind of delightful people who really ought to reproduce. I'm so excited to see how her belly has grown in a month!

Yesterday my sister-in-law sent me a text photo of Morgan. I do realize that I am biased and I don't know for sure if he's the cutest kid ever born but I sure do love him more then I realized I was going to. I mean, I love plenty of people and the way I feel about members of my family is kind of bordering on ridiculous. But I am constantly surprised at how often I'm thinking about Morgan, or craving photos of him, or buying him stuff or just flat out missing him. All those years I kind of rolled my eyes at the baby hungry girls around me going on and on about their nieces and nephews-I just didn't know. I am constantly wondering what his voice is going to sound like and what food will be his favorite and what kind of music we'll teach him to enjoy. And when I think about anyone every hurting his feelings or him being disappointed, well I guess it's just a good thing I'm working through some of my serious meddling mother tendencies now.

Kids are rad, I'm glad people are having them. I'm off to see what I can eat in front of pregnant Angela to make her really jealous (bring me tuna! bring me feta!!)

Panther

I have been really spoiled with good visitors since I moved here. My friend Rudy was in town for work last week and into the weekend. He had all his evenings free so we got to hang out quite a bit. We had lots of interesting conversations about politics and religion and relationships while trying good restaurants, seeing James Bond, shopping and hitting up a show last night. We had a lot of fun. One highlight for me is that Rudy is a serious internet sleuth and he managed to find and download all seven episodes of the Friday Night Lights season currently airing only on DirecTV. I had only seen the first two episodes at a friend's house before I decided that imposing on people who didn't watch the show was going to get old.

I have said this before and I will say it again-this is one of the greatest television shows of ever. It got a little off track last season in it's quest to get more viewers and the first episode of this season felt a little uneven as well. I was worried. But I've spent the last two days laughing and crying and feeling like I was at a family reunion. High drama is gone and we just have our quiet little Dillon, Texas back.

Winter is coming and if you are looking for something to do with your long, chilly evenings, go to Target or put Season One of FNL in your Netflix cue and catch up. This DirecTV season will be on NBC in February and it's well written, beautifully shot and the acting is stellar. It's totally worth getting hooked.

The music on the show is always so great too, one of my favorite finds from these last few episodes is this one by Scott Matthews.

Offering

Katie made a really great point that with Thanksgiving so late we really won't get the full amount of Christmas music listening time. So that means I should really start on my mixes this weekend.

And since some of you have expressed interest in getting your hands on one, you can send an email to the address on my profile. But be warned, no artist is off the table when it comes to holiday music.

Special

I really, really love Christmas music. I like the traditional hymns and carols, I like modern interpretations of old songs, I like new christmas songs as long as they aren't just lame pop songs with Christmas lyrics. During the holiday season I listen to so much Christmas music that I almost irritate myself with all the good cheer.

However! I hold fast to my mother's rule that you DON'T PLAY CHRISTMAS MUSIC UNTIL THANKSGIVING. So it was with a certain amount of dismay that I discovered the radio station here in Boston that has already started it's "all christmas all the time" rotation way, way too early. Imagine how torn I was last night when I turned on the car and heard the lovely beginning strains of Nat King Cole's "Christmas Song"-a song that is not only perfect and timeless on it's own but still has the power to make me feel like I am seven years old and watching my mother put that record on the turntable and oh it's the most wonderful time of the year!!!-and while my heart was all ready to give in and start singing and charging down nostalgia lane, my mind was saying, "no no no!! it's not time! it's NOT TIME! I AM NOT READY!". It was awful. I had to change stations because I can't possibly taint such a perfect song with so much internal conflict. As much as I wanted to go home and start dusting off my playlists and getting my mixes ready (I might even send one to a lucky reader or two) I knew that in this world of instant gratification, I want to stand firm on my decision to wait. I want to save my ears so that when the time is right, I can properly enjoy U2 covering "Baby Please Come Home" and driving through the snow to "Valley Winter Song" by Fountains of Wayne. I want The Oak Ridge Boys Christmas album to feel as special as it always did when I memorized every word as a kid. I get so excited thinking about Harry Connick Jr, and the MoTab Choir and that fantastic "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" that the Barenaked Ladies did with Sarah Mclachlan but I will hold out. I'm pretty sure it's totally going to be worth the wait.

Do you realize

Last weekend I was looking for some good sweaters to get my wardrobe ready for the long dark winter. There happened to be an American Eagle on the street so I popped in thinking they usually have cute winter things and that's when it happened. I realized that I am too old for American Eagle. And not in a "oh sad! I'm not cool enough anymore" kind of way but in a "ugh, I hate this place and I would rather have one nice piece from J. Crew then four from here" kind of way. And in a year when I'm feeling my age way more then I want to, it's kind of nice to have those moments where I feel like the good kind of adult.

(Thankfully I'm also the kind who rushed home from the gym to watch Gossip Girl so there's that too.)

Holly Berries

Just bought my tickets home to Utah for the holidays. It will be delightful to see everyone but mostly it will be good to see this guy.

New Edition

Several members of my family have joined the blog world recently.

My mom is blogging about her spectacular garden. You seriously have to see it to believe it-her yard looks like she's got an entire staff.

My brother Christopher is blogging about Urban Planning and it's terribly interesting stuff if you like things like the earth and ways to make it better.

And my brother Logan is blogging about life in general.

That makes seven of us with blogs. We are taking over the world you see.

Royalty

My musical preferences are all over the board. The last few purchases in my iTunes include K-os, DJ Antoine, Martin Sexton, Brett Dennen, Leona Naess, Bill Conti, Ryan Adams and Adele. I like a little bit of just about anything. But I have this photo of me when I was just old enough to sit up, on the floor in front of my pops playing his electric guitar. The foundations of my education were built by a guy who liked to rock.

So while I adore my swedish pop and my hip hop and my singer/songwriter friends, give me guitars, give me drums, give me loud music through giant speakers and I am a happy, happy girl. Kings of Leon is such a band and their newish album Only by Night is just chock full of songs that will fill up your whole body. I found this live version of "Use Somebody"-it's rich and full and the lyrics are pleading and the guitars are insistent and it's about to make me go tear it up on the five miler I feel like I need today. I really recommend you watch this with your speakers up as high as possible. Songs like this are the reason groupies exist.

Rock

Although I've been planning to vote for Barack Obama for quite a long time now, I wasn't prepared to be as emotional as I was last night and continue to be today. Watching his beautiful family come onto the stage last night I burst into tears. I had some things I wanted to say but I feel like my sister and my dad both did it better.

I hope that regardless of who you voted for, we can all send our prayers and good thoughts to the man who will be leading us for the next four years. It's an unstable world right now and he will need all the help he can get.

Tears of Joy

Hooray for Change. I am awake too late and should be doing other things but I sat and watched President Obama make a really wonderful and inspiring speech tonight. I'm ready to see what he's got in store for us.

V-O-T-E

I'm so excited to vote tomorrow. I hope you are too.

I brought some work home from the office and although I'm not that excited about doing it, I did get in a workout and a good episode of Gossip Girl and I get to listen to whatever I want while I do it.

Tonight it's all Ryan Adams and the Cardinals. The new album came out this week and I'm so in love.

This song is super sexy people, 5 seconds into it I was hooked.



I realize that I have what borders on an unhealthy attachment to Mr. Adams but seriously! Listen to this stuff!!

And then get up early and VOTE!

You Betcha

I decided to take advantage of the many comparisons I've gotten to Tina Fey over the last year or so and I did this for Halloween

More gems from last night

Yep

I'm one of those aunts.



OK, so Morgan in his Halloween costume is silly cute. But I love this video because it pretty much tells you what kind of family we are. The last 20 seconds are awesome.

Secret Garden

There was a decree put out by my father when I was a wee one that all tiny females in our house would be of the piggy tail wearing variety for as long as possible. I was happy to oblige and for most of my formative years I was a staunch long haired girl. I loved it. I used to put it in hot rollers every. single. day of high school. Then about a week before graduation I decided I wanted short hair with my cap and gown and I made my mother hack most of it off. That was 14 years ago and I've been a shortie ever since. And I like it just fine thank you very much.

But. I will confess that sometimes after a little too much Gossip Girl I fantasize a bit about having long flowing locks again. So I admit that tonight when I bought the brown wig I am using for my Halloween costume (you'll see), I might have spent kind of a silly amount of time playing with it in front of the mirror. I love my short hair but there is something super girly about a nice cascade down your back.

On

The best part about my last entry is that three members of my family had to ask if I was coming to Utah for the weekend.

Nope.

I went to California to play with this baby

And see this family

And play with these friends


And watch these two get married.


I didn't take enough pictures, I drank too much Diet Coke, I thought about pretty much everything. It was a fairly perfect weekend.

Off

I am taking a little vacation for the next few days. Getting on a plane to go watch some friends get hitched, hold a baby, hang with family, stay up too late with friends, eat some good food, see a couple of bridges, take more photos then I need and enjoy weather that doesn't freeze my bones.

I'll leave you with this old song that came on in the car tonight and made me even more excited about the next few days of doing nothing but connecting. Hip hip!

Pavement

So did anyone else come for the political funny on SNL last night and stay for the Adele???

I have listened to this song at least twenty times today.
Chasing Pavements

Soul

My friend Jed loves Donny Hathaway. When he was at my house a few weeks ago, he introduced me to this version of "You've Got A Friend" featuring Donny and Roberta Flack. I got lots of lovely calls and messages and votes of confidence from many, many good friends this week and feel beyond blessed at all the fantastic people in my life right now. Thanks to so many of you for making me feel so loved during a bit of a rough spot. Things are looking way up.

Here you go, your new favorite song.

Found

I was admiring my baby sister's Flickr page and I come across an old photo titled
Katie is singing along to George Michaels

Oh yes I am.

Who Who

Corey sent me this for my birthday. So radical.

Eve

In about four hours, I will be 32 years old. That seems so old when I say it out loud. It also sounds really old when you hear yourself saying it to the 25 year old boys that make up the bulk new fall crop in your ward. Roast.

To be perfectly frank, I'm not sad to see 31 go. I was just reading some of my restless "what am I doing with my life?" posts from the fall of 2007 and I realize now that I definitely, definitely set myself up for a pretty humbling year. I don't think you can ask the universe for an opportunity to grow without accepting that it might just knock you right over first.

And so tonight, I'm doing something a bit unusual for me and for this blog and I'm writing a fairly religious post. I am usually fairly private about this kind of stuff because it's so personal. But I feel like I can't write in any honest away about the way I'm feeling about this last year without it. So off I go. You've been fairly warned!

It's not a big secret that this year has been a tough one. And I say that with the full acknowledgement that I have a very good life and have been blessed in more ways then I can count. I understand that many of my struggles seem awfully superficial in the face of poverty and war and economic despair. So I am keeping my year of personal disappointment and struggle in perspective. That said, I started crying about something last Saturday morning and I have been at it on some level every since. I'm worn out from a year of wanting a change, praying for a change, holding my breathe through job interviews, major decisions about a move that was evenly split between pros and cons, the move itself and all the mixed emotions, seven months in a city I just can't seem to gel with like I want to, family and friends that are almost all too far away and a job that I am not rocking like I am used to rocking. I'm worn out and tired of hearing myself complain about it in conversations with friends and blog posts and certainly tired of whining about it in my prayers pretty much every night.

So yesterday in church, the Second Counselor in our Bishopric and his wife spoke. It's always a treat to hear her speak-she was a big time journalist for years until they got married and she decided to leave her job to raise a couple of cute cute kids. She's a good speaker anyway but since she got married when she was a little older and had a great career before that, her talks resonate particularly well with me. She basically talked about how being a good kid and doing everything right and trying your best doesn't mean that life will always be smooth sailing. Which is something I think most of us get intellectually but then when we find ourselves in the midst of a major trial it feels like "why is this happening to me?? I'm trying so hard! I'm doing what You asked!" And then it's really easy to just feel like you've been left alone. At least it is for me. She talked a lot about learning from these dark hours and shared a story about a chicken hatching exhibit she took her kids to a few weeks ago. As they watched the little chickie struggle to get out of her shell her daughter turned to her with big sad eyes and said, "we have to help her mommy!" And of course she had to explain like many, many mothers have to four years olds the world over that the chick needs to get out of that shell on it's own if it's going to be able to grow up healthy and strong. I've been wondering today how many times in my life I will find myself back in that shell and thinking about how I want to make sure every time I learn a little bit more about how to crack out of it. She closed her talk just reminding us that the Lord really doesn't leave us alone but sometimes it's up to us to quiet down so we can hear His voice. I cried through the whole talk. And not just a little bit-the big heaving sort of crying that you can't pass off as being tired or having something in your eye. I'm sure there were plenty of folks in the room that appreciated her talk but it felt kind of like she was talking right to me.

I really tried to have a quiet day today but I have this overactive brain and I just got so overwhelmed by work and life that I ended up at my friend Matt's house pouring out my guts to a guy who has been a wonderfully wise ear and shoulder since my first Boston tour of duty. He ended up giving me a blessing and it was like peace and calm could finally find a way into my chaos. I came home feeling like there are still a lot of question marks and things to worry about but I feel certain of God's nearness in my life, of His concern for me and His willingness to help when I ask for it.

People sometimes say that religion is a crutch and I guess to that I say, well OK, I'll take a crutch if that's what I need to go from feeling desperately sad to wildly hopeful and peaceful in the space of a few hours.

31 was really hard. Productive, growing, stretching, but hard. I'm ready for 32 to be less dramatic.

I'm leaving you with a performance of one of my very favorite religious songs. I've always loved the lines

"Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love, Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above"

Shelter

I cannot for the life of me understand people who pay good money to go to a concert and then proceed to heckle the artist and generally behave like idiots. And here's a tip, if you only know one of his songs, don't go to the show and start yelling for that song 10 minutes in. It's the big hit, he's going to play it, but some of us are what we call "fans" and we'd like to just let the man play.

I went to see Ray Lamontagne at the Boston Opera House tonight. Beautiful venue, sold out crowd, I made friends with the cute little Spanish tourists sitting next to me-it was such a perfect beginning. And then it felt like someone let a bunch of drunken junior high school kids loose all over the place. There were people shouting non-stop for his major hit pretty much right after the first song. Then there were probably five or six jerks in the balcony who were mimicking the way he sang and the couple in front of me having a conversation at full volume during a quiet song when the place was otherwise silent. Finally, the loudest offender was escorted out by security and when someone yelled, "let him play what he wants," and the audience cheered I think it sent a message to shut. thehell. up. But even at the encore, Ray himself stopped playing a few bars in and asked that someone in the front row be thrown out. I was as mad as a little hornet and felt especially embarrassed after the show when my new friends told me that in Spain, "nobody cries at the singer."

Who ARE these people??? Do we not know the difference between a performance and a baseball game?

Make

I haven't been feeling particularly creative lately. I have a long mental list of things I want to write about and none of it is coming together like I want it to. I'm sorry, I have to jumpstart my brain and writing about music often does that for me. So we are playing i-pod shuffle today. 10 songs, in order, no skipping, a little blurb on each one.

1. A Change is Gonna Come-Sam Cooke

Who writes good protest songs anymore? It's one thing to take swipes at specific politicians and quite another to come up with something thoughtful and subtle. I am so tired of this election and all the hysteria coming from both sides. I am ready for everyone to stop talking and start acting. And although I think many of you know which way I am voting, I am pretty convinced that either candidate will be a refreshing change from the current yahoos (sorry dad.) Anyway, this song has great lyrics, Sam Cooke has such a smooth voice and in less then a month, change is comin' whether you like it or not.



2. Thank God I'm A Country Boy-John Denver

Some of the first things I can remember about my life are the times my dad would play John Denver and Neil Diamond songs on the guitar for my brother and me. There are several songs that I can still see him throwing back his head and singing with wild abandon-a characterisic my laid back dad rarely exhibits. Thank God I'm a Country Boy, Grandma's Feather Bed and Kentucky Woman are those songs. A few years ago pops gave me John Denver's greatest hits for my birthday and I knew every last word to this song even though I hadn't heard it in years. It's really too bad we lost Mr. Denver so early. Dude knew how to write a song.

*note, this is a fan video for the show "Alias" but whatever, the song is the point.


3. Falling-Ben Kweller

This might be one of my favorite love songs of all time. Doesn't it just seem like the perfect soundtrack to a romantic montage from some cheesy chick flick? Except that it's not cheesy, it's more like totally awesome? It just feels like the first little while when you like someone and everything they say is funny or brilliant and every text or call makes your head kind of explode in a good way. Like there are balloon launches happening in your stomach or something. That's what this song feels like. Internal exploding balloon launches.



4. The Hit Parade-Unkle Bob

Corey and I were driving somewhere in California and this song came on and I couldn't pay attention to what she was saying anymore. It's sad, he wants to forget her but also still kind of wants her to love him. I'll tell you that it was a perfect soundtrack for some of my favorite runs at Crystal Cove, a place I'm definitely still trying to get over.



5. Time After Time-Eva Cassidy

I've already posted about this song on this blog. So I'm letting you watch Cindy Lauper sing with Sarah McLachlan because they are both awesome. And anytime you add strings to a song that didn't have them before I am happy.



6. Dead Men's Will-Iron and Wine

YES! What a happy accident that this song means I get to talk about the fact that FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS IS BACK!!! This song was on some really sad scene in season one when both Tim Riggins and Matt Saracen were losing at life which is to say, I don't even remember specifically which episode it was. It's only on DirecTV this year which means I have to keep asking my friend with the Dish to let a few us come over to watch it but I feel like I'm amongst family again. The season premiere felt a little forced but last night's was right back to family drama and teen love and the boys on the field. My little show. I love you.



7. This Year's Love-David Gray

For about a year after my mission and a year of my time working for the Olympics I lived with two of my favorite girls in a cute little house on a cute little street in cute little Sugarhouse. I loved my job, I had a fun group of friends, I was dating for the first time in my life and I had this wonderful gigantic bedroom in the basement of our house. There are four or five albums from that time period that I played to death to death to death. White Ladder from David Gray was one of those CD's I wore through. My sister and I went to see him at Salt Air one night and made friends with a funny red haired kid who shared his M&M's with us and it was wonderful. I still listen to David Gray from time to time but it nearly always makes me feel homesick.



8. I See You, You See Me-The Magic Numbers

OH I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH! The Magic Numbers are two sets of brother-sister siblings (it will probably not surprise you that it would be a fantasy of mine to be in a band with my sibs and travel all over the world in a little musical bubble with in-laws and kids and puppies running about backstage)and they sound like heaven when you see them live. I put this song on a CD for my friend Emily a million years ago and knew we would be fast friends when she became as obsessed with it as I was. It makes me think of Boston in the fall which is terribly appropriate for today.



9. Meditate-INXS

In 12th grade a girl named Sarah moved into my ward from Modesto, California. She was living with her older sister who had a tall handsome husband and a beautiful baby and could pull off red lipstick. Sarah was like a fascinating alien to me. She dressed in vintage clothes and wore platform shoes and carried a purse instead of a backpack to school. She wanted to be a furniture designer and she made friends with all the dirty boys in the South Hall. Her last name was Italian and fun to say and she'd been to raves but was still a really good girl. She was beautiful and cool and incredibly confident and if I didn't feel like I fit in at school, Sarah DEFINITELY didn't fit in. But for some reason she and I hit it off at church her first Sunday and soon we were BFF like can happen in 20 seconds when you are a teenager. She was one of the girls that helped me realize there was probably life beyond the Wasatch Front and my 17 year old concerns for my future. The Valentine's Dance that year was a girl's choice but I didn't want to go and she didn't want to go so instead we went to the second concert of my life which was INXS at the Salt Palace. It felt all grownup and slightly dangerous to me to be at a rock concert while everyone our age was dancing awkwardly in the gym at school. I lost contact with Sarah after I went off to college and she drifted out of Utah. I like to think she's living in San Francisco in some beautiful space she designed herself, making furniture for her and lovely things for everyone around her. She was smart and creative and not afraid to be her outside the norm self and I think of her pretty much anytime I hear this song. It also has my name in it which is cool.



10. Miss Independent-Ne Yo

My friend Delvique's phone plays this song when you call her. I get her voicemail a lot so I've heard it through more then a few times and the lyrics kinda got me.

Ooh there's something about
Kinda woman that can do for herself
I look at her and it makes me proud
There's something about her

Something, ooh, so sexy about
Kinda woman that don't even need my help

She's got her own thing
That's why I love her

Come on, how could I resist a celebration of the independent girl? And whatever, it's the first Ne-Yo song to hit my iPod either. Leave me alone.




And there we go. I feel like a million times more creatively juicy then before!

Link

It's my mom's birthday today. And I can't top this.

Fox in Sox

I think I have made mention of the Fleet Foxes a few times in the last six months. I fell in love with them before I left California and have been dying to see them pretty much since first listen. So you might find it odd that although I carried around a page from the local paper announcing their October show for two months I never bothered to buy tickets. And by the time I did get around to it they were sold out. Fortunately a friend who saw them in New York this weekend talked me into just going to the venue anyway and I ended up tucked in the Sommerville Theater by my little self this evening for one of the more awesome live shows of ever.

It's kind of amazing that a bunch of guys who look kind of homeless can sound like an angel choir but hot damn they have got the most incredible harmonies. Which I know from listening to the album all summer but hearing them live was completely different. You know that feeling you get when someone whose hands you really like touches the back of your neck? That's what it felt like to me. These guys write the kind of music that feels like it's filling up all the space in your car or your room or the theater. You can actually feel yourself getting folded into it.

I've been really spoiled with music in the last few weeks. I'm trying to stay humble but the rest of the year will have it's work cut out for it.

Please download this and listen to it as loud as you can.
Blue Ridge Mountains

Sundance

I had a very nice weekend of running, catching up on the phone with friends, listening to conference, cleaning the house and sleeping in. It was heavenly. One of the highlights was finally watching the movie The Way We Were. I won't spoil it for anyone but here are a few observations:

1. Robert Redford is a very, very good looking man
2. I would take every piece of clothing in Barbara Streisand's wardrobe and wear them now
3. They just don't make movies like they used to

Here is Babs singing the theme song from the movie. That lady can sure sing.

Eerie

Two nights ago my friend and I got to talking about the band Sigur Ros and the country of Iceland. We talked about how awesome they are and we should go there to see what kind of a place inspires such creative music. He mentioned wanting to learn Icelandic.

The next morning, the Steep and Cheap email was all about Sigur Ros. My friend got an Amazon book suggestion about learning unusual languages and my email from the Anthrologie list today is a catalogue all shot in-you guessed it-Iceland.

It almost seems dumb not to get just get on a plane and see what the universe is so insistent about.

Face

I mentioned last week that somebody posted some high school dance photos on Facebook. I'm a little embarrassed to admit how much they got me thinking about those three weird years of my life. It scary true how much faster time goes by as you age but I remember being convinced that high school was going to last for the rest of eternity. That I would always feel awkward and unsure of myself, that I would never quite find a place where I fit, and that I would be wearing my braces until well into my thirties. My grades at the time would say that I was really good at school but my social calendar would show you that I never quite got the hang of that place. Adults would always tell me that I was probably the kind of kid that would do better in college and they were right. I do hope however that I remember how little that comforts a 16 year old girl who doesn't want to sit on the sidelines but has no idea how to get out there. I spent more time then I should have this weekend trying to figure out how to split the blame between myself and the other kids.

I've been fortunate over the years in that quite a few of the people I was intimidated by in high school have drifted back into my life for various reasons. It's always interesting to talk about how we all saw each other back then. I had one girl tell me that I seemed like a smart kid who wouldn't have wanted anything to do with the cheerleader crowd she was part of. I oten think that if I ever have teenagers, I hope they can have a better experience in those years then I did. I'm still not even convinced that I would have given up my endless months of play practice and Saturdays lost to debate meets (oh yeah people, it's like I was TRYING to drive 16 year old boys away) in exchange for dances and football games. Two thoughts kept coming back-I had younger siblings who were infinitely cooler then I was who still felt like they didn't have enough friends, or the right friends, or struggled with the myriad of other things that every teenager every feels regardless of social status (except maybe Blair Waldorf but even she has to watch out for Serena.) And two, when will I ever learn that the grown up me is pretty much a sum total of all the things that younger me had to deal with. You take away the braces and the unrequited crushes and I think you lose a lot what inspired that little girl to make a lot of plans for how her life was going to go. I hope hope hope I can remember that if I ever have a kid who isn't the picture of high school popularity. Which um, sorry potential future offspring, I pretty much guarantee is going to be the case if I've been your mother.

The truth is that fourteen years later I still don't always feel like I fit. My religious beliefs keep me a little separated from most of my peers but there are lots of things about my life that make me feel just a little bit out of the norm at church. But it's funny how that has gone from being something that made me feel so lonely to something that makes me feel lucky. Not being tied to one group has allowed me some freedom over the years and I've been able to piece together a pretty stellar collection of friends. Two weekends ago when Jed from SUU and Traci from HB came to visit and they hit it off with each other and with my current roommate, my heart almost burst from the awesomeness of watching all these parts of my life blend so splendidly. So I'll try to remember that next time I catch myself looking at someone else's glory days and feeling like I missed out.

Here's a song by OutKast that I love on the topic of being cool. Another good rainy day song on what it ANOTHER RAINY DAY IN BOSTON?? Who exactly where the crazy people that settled this place and why didn't they keep moving??

Open Letter

Dear world-

The word is anyway. Not anyways.

Thanks.

k8

Claim

My high school years have exploded all over Facebook in the past few weeks. Folks I haven't thought of in a million years are appearing in the "people you may know" tab. There is a post percolating in my brain about high school but I'm struggling to get the tone right. That's what the rainy weekend will be for since I'm still iffy on bike riding on slick roads.

The weather is definitely turning here and cold weather makes me both melancholy and nostalgic even without the internet hitting me over the head with faces from the past. One of the great things about the age of iTunes and the MP3 is that it's become a million times easier to reclaim songs with sad memory baggage attached to them. For years and years my heart would drop into my shoes every time I heard "Now That We Found Love" by Heavy D and the Boyz because of the part it played in the worst stomp of my high school career (for anyone who did not attend Cottonwood High School, stomps were the non-date dances. And they were either amazing or horrible, there was no middle ground. Because your crush either asked you to dance or he didn't. Period.) But then three or four years ago I bought it on iTunes and now I can listen to it without one bit of teen angst ruining the bass line. Which is good because I do love me some Heavy D (Is It Good To You and Nuttin' But Love being two of my early nineties favorites).

But there is a song that I can't seem to clean up no matter how many I listen to it. I hear the first five seconds and I am in rental car in Chicago, completely broken hearted over a boy, listening to a voicemail message from my friend Emily and finding this song on what felt like every single station in the whole city. I adore Chicago, my event went well that weekend and I had some of the best sushi of my life one of my nights there but it's like I couldn't escape this damn song. But I really liked it so I would catch myself listening to it anyway. And now, even though that boy is long gone and so are those feelings, I can't shake that pit in my stomach when it starts up. Since I'm a sucker for a good melodramatic moment though I keep it in the old iPod....

Anyway, I guess rainy days + too much high school on the brain = Tim McGraw and Nelly

Naughty

Every few weeks they offer 15 minute chair massages at my office. I woke up Saturday morning with a couple of knots that I still haven't managed to get rid of so I signed up. As the therapist was working out one of the little buggers she mentioned that the body is divided up into sections sort of like the brain is. The area of my back where all my knots have taken us residence?

"Men and business."

Yikes.

Simplify

Sometimes there is just nothing quite as awesome as a low key evening to yourself. I was working on a five year budget plan presentation all day and it pretty much fried my brain. I really should have gone straight to the gym but by the time my boss and I finished dotting all the i's on the thing it was already 7:00. This little scatterbrain left her workout bag at home this morning and I figured by the time I went home to eat something and change clothes there was little chance I would get back out the door on a chilly Wednesday night.

So instead, I went to the grocery store and bought the ingredients for my favorite meal of all time and came home and cooked to the musical stylings of Dolly Parton, Amos Lee, Jeff Buckley and The Bee Gees. Then I settled in to watch one of the old episodes of Friends I have filled my Tivo with since I discovered that TBS runs them twice a day. And THEN I took a long, hot, nighttime shower and am now happily blogging wrapped up in a blanket and towel on the couch. Anyone who has ever lived with me will tell you that the towel is pretty much my favorite article of clothing. And now with the weather getting cold, I top that off with a big fluffy blankie and I am pretty much the happiest, warmest little creature on the planet right now.

Speaking of things I love, the other night a friend was over and we were playing "do you know this song" with my laptop and his iPhone. He'd never heard of Jeff Buckley, I wrong I was quick to right. I don't want that to happen to any of you. This song is beautiful anyway but Buckley had a voice that is otherworldly.

Last Goodbye

And I'm for one last simple pleasure of the night, my clean white sheets and eight hours of sleep.

Animal House

Friday night I got to have dinner with one of my dear friends from college and her little family. It doesn't matter how many of my friends get married and have babies, it still amazes me every single time I meet husbands and kidlets that girls I used to giggle about boys with in college are now someone's mommy. I am turning 32 in three weeks and continue to believe that I'm way too young for this to be my life. It was really fun to see Jennie and meet her cute husband Rick and ADORABLE baby Max.


So I was maybe feeling a bit nostalgic anyway as I headed into my weekend and off to run our sponsorship booth at this year's Farm Aid Show. I don't typically get super star struck but sitting at the Press Conference and seeing these guys all together on stage was pretty heady for anyone who loves American Music.

(that's Willie Nelson, Neil Young, John Mellencamp and Dave Matthews for anyone who has lived in a cave for the last 40 years)
Once upon a time I used a person's feelings about the Dave Matthews Band as a barometer for my feelings for that person. I bought his CD's at midnight release parties, my sister and I drove hundreds of miles to see them perform, I crossed my own professional boundaries and begged a boss to use his connections to get me good seats at a show one time-I really, really loved this band. Over the years though I wasn't loving the new releases so much and there was so much other great music out there that I kind of lost interest in DMB. It didn't hurt that they become the artist of choice for a lot of real tools and were no longer a very good personality gauge. I quit listening around the same time I moved to California the first time and a lot of things in my life were changing. My friend Derick had told me about a hundred times that one of the great things about moving to a new city all alone was that you really got a chance to know yourself. When you don't have many friends and you are still settling into a job you have a lot of free time and you get to know what you like to do/think/feel/watch/read/listen to when no one is watching. That's when I got serious about running, discovered Radiohead and starting liking artsy boys. I felt like a new person and in a lot of ways, I distanced myself from many things I had cared about before. I'm still not sure why I felt like I had to roll my eyes at things I had once liked in order to prove I was growing.

I've gotten a wee bit more mature since then I think. I hope. Last night I stepped away from the booth for a few minutes to catch Dave's part of the show. Hearing his voice live for the first time in probably seven years actually got me a little choked up. It felt so familiar and comforting. So today I've been basking in old DMB memories. Here's a favorite.
Grey Street

Average

So I'm hanging out with these guys tonight









Yep, Chris Botti, Sting, Steven Tyler, Yo Yo Ma are all playing with the Boston Pops tonight. And even if you hate Aerosmith or you think Sting hasn't written a good song since The Police broke up, I think you can still appreciate that this is one going to be one hell of a good night of music. And a really good excuse to get dressed up on a Thursday. Pretty much my favorite kind of evening.

OMG

I am becoming one of those people! The ones who get photos of their nephew and have to go show everyone in the office. But I don't know how anyone can't expect me to behave when stuff like THIS
shows up in my mailbox in the middle of the day. Are you joking? Do I really think it's cool to live 2500 miles from THAT LITTLE FACE AND THOSE SKINNY SKINNY FROG LEGS? Everytime I look at him I think "my little brother who used to have a bowl cut and be scared of the moon MADE that. He's that guy's DAD." I love it that he's such a perfect mix of both parents. He's got his mom's lips and his dad's lashes but he's also looking like his own person.
Oh I love this baby.

Horoscope

So many of you know that I have a crush/slight obsession with the daily emails from the website Steep and Cheap. Last night's edition made me laugh right out loud because seriously, I think the writer and I really just need to get married. Two overly dramatic worriers in one house sounds like a real treat doesn't it?

A squirrel broke in one day and it wouldn't leave. It was sitting in my friend's cereal bowl eating Peanut Butter Capn' Crunch with one hand and rubbing the top of its head with the other. Too much contact with humans had taken away its fear, so the animal would just sit and stare at you while you waved your hands in the air trying to scare it back out the window. Later I would worry that by letting it live we would be the cause of a massive squirrel migration into human domiciles, or at least a squirrel rapture on the scale of Hitchcock's The Birds. I was afraid this squirrel would tell its friends that humans were nothing to be feared, and then the animals would roam our homes with impunity. Turns out it wasn't that big of a deal and I'd grossly over dramatized the problem. Kind of like pretty much everything else I've ever worried about.

The Wagon

I think there are six women in the entire United States who feel completely comfortable with their bodies. I don't know any of them personally and I think four of them are supermodels anyway. Even the kind of smart, successful, down-to-earth women I generally surround myself with and who really do know better can give you five things about themselves they wish they could change. There are varying degrees of course and as we get older and smarter most of get our teenage body image hysteria pretty much under control and manage to knock it pretty far down on the priority list.

That said, most of us still care what we look like and nearly all of us care about what we FEEL like. So when I did that cleanse um, two short months ago, it was about 20% motivated by how I was going to look and 80% how I was going to feel. The cleanse delivered on both counts and I was thrilled. So it is with much regret that I admit how hard I fell off the wagon. I won't get graphic but let's just say that there was enough Diet Coke in my veins this weekend to keep the entire freshman class at Harvard awake through finals week. I had peanut M & M's for breakfast on Saturday. And ladies and gentlemen, I feel like some kind of junkie. I have always believed in the close connection between your physical health and your emotional/spiritual health but whoo boy is it pretty crystal clear right now. You would think I would learn this lesson from marathon training or being diligent about sleep or eating healthy but no, the motivation to make true lifestyle changes is coming because I had a candy hangover yesterday.

This experience is nothing compared to true addictions that people struggle with but I do find that I'm feeling a little bit more sympathetic to those around me trying to make big changes. It's hard. Even when you know it's the right thing.

As for me, I'm back. Not back on the cleanse, but back to applying the lessons I kinda thought I already learned. It's possible for little miss "I had to come back to a city I already lived in to get it right", this is just the way it goes....

Stolen

Check out the eyelashes on this kid!!! I almost want to put him in a dress.

Oh gosh I love this little face.

Peace Train

My house is spotless, my professional idol was hilarious in the opening sketch on SNL last night, my roommate and I had our first joint party and it was super fun, I got to play hostess to a dear old friend and a wonderful new friend this weekend, Bon Iver sounds perfect on a rainy sunday night, all signs point to a good night's sleep and I found out today that two of my favorite ladies just became second time mommies (lots of love to the The Oversons and the Bischoffs!!!).





Plus, there is SO much Dolly and Kenny on YouTube.



(My heart skips a little beat when she says "what is it Kenny?")

Ride

I was reading an article today about what celebs had in their backstage riders for the VMA's so I was thinking about what I would want in my dressing room if I was a big star.

-vase of fresh flowers in bright colors
-one Jo Malone Pomegranate Noir Home Candle
-CD player or iPod dock
-big bowl of peanut m and m's
-Stacy's Simply Naked and Cinnamon Sugar Pita Chips
-Selection of Odwalla Juices and Polar Cranberry Lime Soda
-a tray of chopped vegetables
-bowl of grapes
-an internet connection (because duh, I would be a celeb blogger you guys)
-and probably some doughnuts. because it's friday afternoon and I just really, really want a doughnut.

See? I'm not too demanding.

Apparently LL Cool J asked for 24 long stemmed roses with individual water tubes which frankly creeped me right now. Exactly how many groupies are you entertaining Mister?

Roots

For most of my teenager years, my favorite thing to do when my dad would talk about country music was to roll my eyes and make gagging sounds. He would call it "the music of the people" and I would say, "yeah, the music of the STUPID people."

So I guess it's kind of funny that there is a distinct twang in a lot of what I like these days. Ryan Adams and Wilco and Ray Lamontagne sound a lot more like Willie Nelson then Bon Jovi or whatever I was listening to when I was 14.

But even as I was making fun of my father's taste, I always felt guilty about a little secret obsession from my past. When I was probably 6 or 7 I had a compilation tape that I LOVED. Like would listen to over and over and over and make up dances and try to learn every single word. I don't know who gave it to me and what ever became of it but to this day, I can still sing a lot of the songs and vaguely remember some of the "choreography". I was goofing around on YouTube this weekend and I dug up a few of the standouts from that tape. Maybe I do have a little Idaho in me after all.


Oh Alabama. I would shake my head at my dad for liking country and THIS was one of my favorites? This thing is practically wearing overalls and driving a tractor it's so country. Whatever, I also love "If You're Gonna Play in Texas" and "Song of the South" and I don't care what anyone thinks.



I really DO love a rainy night.



Um, I'm sorry, are there any songs more awesome then the Devil Went Down to Georgia? I remember being SO proud of myself when I learned every last lyric to this. Also, I'm really sorry Pops that I quit the violin before I ever learned to play this song. And also really sorry to any future offspring but it's possible YOU might have to right that cosmic wrong.



Another thing my dad really loves? Pigtails on little girls. I always had long hair when I was a wee one and for a long time I wanted to grow it out just like Crystal Gale. But I was a little freaked out at the prospect of my brown eyes going blue.


I don't know how old I was before I finally found out that Kenny and Dolly weren't actually married to each other. And seriously, they don't come better then Dolly Parton. That women is f-a-b-u-l-o-u-s.


No wonder I am so awesome. One of my first favorite songs was The Gambler for crying out loud. The Gambler!!

Here's a little bonus Dolly Parton for you because I'm no longer afraid to admit it-I LIKE COUNTRY MUSIC YOU GUYS.