Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Pilgrim

This is the first Thanksgiving in many, many years that I will not be spending with any member of my family. Last year I bought a last minute ticket home after the thought of being without them was just too sad but that is a much easier thing to do from California then it is from Massachusetts. So tomorrow I will spend the holiday with some newish and some oldish friends and I'm sure it will be lovely. I get to cook some fun things tomorrow and I have a massage and a Celtics game planned for Friday so honestly, I have few complaints about a long weekend mostly to myself.

My brain is sort of a jumble these days. A few weeks ago I was explaining to someone how I wasn't sure if I was in the right career and he said something about my job sounding like something the protagonist in a chick flick would have and I guess he's sort of right. I haven't been able to shake the feeling that no one who dropped in on my life would be able to figure out why the eff I've been struggling so much this year. I have a good job in a scary economic time, I have a cute apartment and an easy roommate, I live in a nice city that is big without being overwhelming, I'm finding some good friends, I have plenty of really cute shoes. And yet. Having my sister here this weekend was blissful but it gets harder and harder to put the people I love on planes and watch them go away. And I do feel restless. There is just no getting around it. I don't know where the line is between being awfully grateful for the life you have-and I mean really, legitimately thankful for all the chances you've been given and the opportunities that practically land in your lap-and wondering if you could be doing more/better/different if you were just braver or stronger. I suppose I am trying to learn the difference between being content with where you are and paying attention to when you are being pushed to do something else. Gosh it's fun to grow!!

All seriousness aside, if my little sister ever asks to visit you, say yes. You will have f-u-n. Check it...
Jumping for joy at The Breakers
What are the odds that Callie and Carl would be in town the same weekend???
Or that Traci and the famous Di would come up from NYC?
We ate the heck out of some cookies.
Emily and B the fashion queens.
Not telling.




Happy Thanksgiving peeps.

4 comments:

Dainon. said...

Tell me more about this easy roommate, yeah?

Anonymous said...

I don't know where the line is between being awfully grateful for the life you have-and I mean really, legitimately thankful for all the chances you've been given and the opportunities that practically land in your lap-and wondering if you could be doing more/better/different if you were just braver or stronger. I suppose I am trying to learn the difference between being content with where you are and paying attention to when you are being pushed to do something else. Gosh it's fun to grow!!
--------> = brilliant, woman. thanks for giving words to thoughts of my befuddled brain.

april said...

I never really though about it, but turning 30 has changed me in more ways than I would have guessed. One of the biggest has been the decrease in my desire to move abroad or even out of state. That's all I wanted for a long time, but all of a sudden the idea of moving away from our families seems awful.

k8 said...

yeah it's interesting how much being far away loses it's luster as you get older. That's why traveling is such a good idea i guess.