Once

About a million years ago I stood in a tiny club in Providence, Rhode Island with nine of my music loving friends as we listened reverently to Sam Beam and company sing songs from Our Endless Numbered Days.

When he started to play "Fever Dream", I had the most intense peaceful feeling come over me. It was so powerful that I still get a chill when I think about it. It felt unquestionably like a message from the heavens that everything was going to work out just as it should. I already loved this song but from that night, it is a go to whenever I need a little reassurance that I don't need to control everything. Iron and Wine had evolved a lot from his lo-fi beginnings but these early albums continue to be some of my favorite sounds of ever.

Renewal

One of the hazards of being a pretty consistent blogger for about four and a half years now is that it's way too easy to walk back through my archives and feel like maybe I am getting dumber.

Dumber might be too harsh. I have been reading old entries recently and thinking-wow, why am I still struggling with something I thought I had all figured out in March 2008? Why do I have to calm myself down every single October when I know another birthday is just no big deal? And most importantly, how come the Facebook test I took in 2006 said I belong in San Francisco and this week it said LA?

It's a double edged sword though because I also often appreciate the collective "self-wisdom" this blog provides. It's comforting to go back and read a post from a time I know was really hard and be able to say, "hey look, I got through that, I actually learned something there!" Progress is not always obvious when you live with yourself every single day-reading old posts is like talking to a friend I haven't seen in awhile and getting to compare now to then.

Which is why I am still so in love with the idea of the letters of advice to your younger self I wrote about several years ago. I had over thirty women submit letters and every single one of them made my spine tingle with it's honesty and insight. I knew a lot of the writers personally but even the ones who were strangers were inspiring. I did notice a common thread that so much of what women wanted to tell their younger selves revolved around not getting too caught up in what boys thought of them. Something I have noted and underlined and circled in my "things to tell my daughters and nieces someday" notebook.

I started that little project last summer just as I was getting ready to move and take a new job and it got a little lost. I still have a lot of friends I'd love to hear from so I'm opening it up again. But this time I'm not limiting it to women. Over the past few weeks I have been reconnecting with a lot of the fantastic men in my life and I'd like to hear from you all as well.

So take half an hour, write yourself a letter, and send it along. I'd love to hear what you'd tell yourself. Submission guidelines are here. Letters can be sent to katieclifford AT gmail dot com.

Here's an advice song I've always loved to get your juices going



Write on!

Open Door

Yesterday morning I got an email from a friend I hadn't seen in person in almost two years who happened to be in town for the day asking if I wanted to hang out.

My schedule was open so we spent the day talking about all kinds of things, exploring Colorado Springs, eating outside, making brownies and watching 30 Rock.

Steve has one of those brains that never ever shuts down and we always have super interesting conversations. We got talking about what is really meaningful in life and what makes us truly happy.

So I'll say this-very few things are as meaningful to me, or make me as happy, as when you can spend time with someone you really care about, talking about things that matter and laughing at things that are awesome.

This clip has been floating around the internet this week (even though it is really old!) and it sort of captures the way I was feeling about the day's delightful turn of events. This song has always been a favorite and this version is just so darn upbeat you can't help but smile. Can you?

Thanks

Little sisters seeking advice
Fall weather
Friends willing to help you learn something new
Conference on the internets
Old friends showing up randomly for the day
Well written movie about my best friend FB
Footloose on the $5 rack
Doing something scary
Hot showers
Entertaining brothers
Remixes
Funny text messages
Corn on the cob
Safe returns
Discovery of new good restaurant
Sore but satisfied body

Ah weekend, bless you.

TGIF!

Oh Friday I love you. All day I can think about what kind of magic the weekend might bring-and even it doesn't quite live up my expectations in the end, no one can tell me that on Friday. Anything can happen in the next two and a half days right?

Some good weekend music for you then. This track made me laugh OUT LOUD when I accidently dowloaded it instead of the Meiko song I had written down. Boys with girlfriends, the absolute dead last kind of boy you want to meet.



Every single day could use more of The Flaming Lips. Every day.



My sister Emily posted this at the beginning of the summer and I have been addicted to it ever since. Summer and weekends have a lot in common you know.



And if you haven't seen this clip from the Jimmy Fallon show of Jimmy and Justin Timberlake doing a history of rap, you won't regret it. I have giant celebrity crushes on both of these gentleman and this certainly adds more fuel to the fire.

Honest Living

Work related projects not in my job description from the last two weeks.So at least I have options if this desk job thing doesn't work out.

My Left Footloose

I had a bad dream last night that followed me into my morning. Good thing this remix of one of last fall's best tunes was here for me.

I've been like a little crack addict with this song since it cycled through Pandora last week. If you are looking for a Pandora station that will keep you flipping to the internet to see what sweet, sweet goodness is in your ears, try the "Florence and the Machine" station. Fabulous remixes, so many great covers and a notebook full of scribbles for bands I have to look up.

Lisztomania got me through many a workout last year when my Boston lungs were struggling-I'm hoping it will work some similiar magic today. I may have taken a week off running after climbing Pikes Peak and um...I might need a little extra dose of motivation.

Tinies

My mom has been putting slides from my childhood onto CD's so I got a whole bunch of photos yesterday I haven't seen since she and my dad would set up the projector in the living room and we'd eat popcorn and watch ourselves on the big screen.

My brother Sterling and I are 18 months apart (I was first, no matter what he might try to get you to believe. A wife and a baby DOESN'T MAKE YOU THE OLDEST!) and then Emily came along about 3 1/2 years later. Ster and I had some good bonding time when we were the only ones in the family and although sibling relationships always have some rough spots, we were pretty good friends all through growing up.

I obviously don't remember this photo because I was probably about four when it was taken but I just love it. I think I do more of the leaning on Sterling now that we are adults.



Don't worry future children-the genes are good.

Conquered

I drove to the top of Pike's Peak twice this summer. Each time I promised myself I would do it right and climb to the top before winter. When my friend Katie asked me about a month ago if I wanted to give it a try, I decided it would be the perfect way to celebrate one year of living in Colorado.

I love anniversaries. They always feel like a natural time to take stock of whatever situation you are in and evaluate if your life is where you want or need it to be. So birthdays, New Year's, seasonal changes, annual events, and other milestones usually get me thinking about what has changed or what should change since the last time I was in this place.

I don't think I've been particularly shy about how great this last year has been. Not just for me, but for a lot of people I care about. There have been weddings and babies and new jobs and houses-it's been wonderful watching so many people I love also progressing in their lives.

Mostly wonderful. I want it to be so crystal clear that I am genuinely and completely thrilled every time I get the "I'm getting married!" or "we're having a baby!" call. I do not begrudge anyone these exciting moments and I don't feel jealous of the good fortune of my friends and family-heaven knows I have way more than my share of goodness in my life. But there are moments, when it's the fourth baby and the fifth wedding announcement in a row when I feel straight up behind. It never used to bother me when I was in my 20's and I was just doing different things than so many of my friends. But now that I'm just about to turn 34, and not only have the lion's share of the people my age but also kids I used to babysit and people born in the 90's gotten hitched or started their families, it's hard not to feel a twinge that maybe I missed a step. I'm just as far from those things as I approach my mid-thirties as I was when I was sneaking up on my mid-twenties. It's bizarre for a girl who has consistently reached her goals to have an area of her life that is relatively impossible to control. I've had to talk myself out of a panic more often than I am comfortable with in the last few months.

Fortunately, a 10 hour hike will give you some time to reflect, even when you do it with six other people.

Some pretty obvious great stuff happened this year. I went to the Olympics. My sister got married. One of my best friends got married and it brought so many of my favorite people to town. We got a new nephew. I went to Mexico for the first time. I had lots of fun visitors. I finally went on one of those big single Mormon trips that always seemed to unappealing and it turned out to be super fun and a great way to meet some great new people. All very good things that this next year will be hard pressed to surpass.

But aside from fun had and excitement generated, I feel like the best part of this past year was all the personal growth I can see when I look back.

I have been keeping a list in the back of the notebook I take to Church of things I would like to do in my life. That list kind of sat there for a few years, mocking me a little bit. So this year I have been a lot more proactive with that list. I bought a ticket to Panama for Thanksgiving because I've never been. My bike basically collected dust for two years in Boston so I made some friends who ride and now I wonder why I was ever afraid of it. I have wanted to learn to rock climb since my brother got into it 15 years ago but just never did. So last week I met some guys who said they'd be happy to take me and I loved it so much I ended up buying equipment and joining a gym. I promised myself I'd spend this non-Games summer exploring Colorado so I hiked and I drove and I weekend adventured. I'd like to say I'm making progress on the list but the fun thing is-it just keeps getting longer and instead of feeling like it's mocking me, it's inspiring me to do more, see more, try more. Something about old dogs and new tricks?

I finally got up the courage this year to let go of a friendship that was not good for me. My close friends, my sister, my mom-they had all told me this was a guy who was never going to be what I kept patiently hoping he had in him. In hindsight, I have no idea why a smart, confident girl with a satisfying life and a healthy network of friends spent so long letting some dumb guy jerk her around. I finally woke up one day and wondered what I might be missing out on because he was taking up too much space in my heart and mind. Truthfully, I'm a little embarrassed that it took me as much time as it did and sometimes the internal dialogue I would run on why it was OK to keep him in my life makes me cringe. I am pretty sure I knew how dumb I was being but I was so stubborn and just wanted to be RIGHT that I held on way beyond all reasonable behavior. But I did finally come around and I've rarely felt as powerful and as in control as I did when I finally said, "enough."

Along those lines, you know I don't go into much detail here about boys but I did let myself get my heart broken this year. He told me at the beginning that I was awfully guarded and so I took a chance and tried not to be. It was short-lived and I am not thrilled with all the ways I handled it while it was happening and especially when it ended. He said some things about me when it was over that were really hard to hear. But with some time and some perspective-he was right, and I feel like I got a crash course in relationships that will be oh so helpful when the next one comes along. My friend Damian once said that a year where you are not in a position to get your heart broken is a wasted one. It's so true I almost want to crochet it on a pillow. As it turns out, getting hurt is not fatal and if you also get to learn a few things, it's well worth the risk.

I have never been great at taking feedback. I like to be good at things and I tend to take it really personally when someone tells me how I can improve. As you can imagine, that can be a serious liability in the workplace. I get almost sick to my stomach when it comes time for a performance review. It doesn't matter if my boss tells me 100 good things, I will fixate on the thing I didn't do well and worry about it and blow it out of proportion and wonder if I am any good at my job. For the last eight years I have been in jobs where you can judge yourself by sales and web traffic and event attendance so you have plenty of impersonal metrics for figuring out how you are doing. Not so anymore. At the end of the Games, a survey goes out to all the team staff, all the athletes, and all the people who worked in your operational site with YOUR name on it and they get to rate you. Then your boss rates you, then the Managing Director weighs in. There are literally hundreds and hundreds of people who get to say things about YOU. As you can imagine, I spent February pretty much in a panic. I knew the reviews would be overwhelmingly positive but that for sure there would be criticism. And at first I was pretty worked up about any kind of negative comment I heard or read. It has taken months and months but I have been working extremely hard to figure out how to take the things are true and use them to improve and to shake off the things that truly don't matter. I was out for a bike ride with my coworker a few weeks ago and after about 30 minutes he said, "are you open to some suggestions about your riding?" I looked at him and said, "Todd, I started doing this three months ago-I am not only open, I am DYING for suggestions." As soon as it was out of my mouth I realized there was a life lesson in there. Staying coachable and humble and being open to the knowledge and experience of others is the only way I am ever going to get better at anything. True at work, true in the new hobbies I'm picking up, and so so so unbelievably true-and maybe most important-in all the relationships in my life. I know I can be a better friend, sister, aunt, in-law and daughter if I can admit that there are ways to improve.

I know there is probably no way to feel completely calm about being single at 34. It's that balance I've been trying to get a handle on for 10 years between being thankful and happy with the life I have and the choices I've made while still being honest with myself that I do want a family of my own someday. It's not easy. But if I spend enough time counting my blessings and trying harder to be the very best version of myself, I have little to complain about.

I posted this song a few weeks ago but it's really taken root in my heart lately. I don't mind taking the long way and as much as I like to win-turns out life just isn't a race.



It's been a crazy year. A rewarding year. A scary year. A learning year. A year I wouldn't trade for anything.

Pwned

OK, so now that I made a list of really terrific albums that show how awesome I am, I'll take Katie's bait and share with you a few albums that I will always love, that might make me look like a dork.

1. Listen Without Prejudice-George Michael
When I lived in Huntington Beach the first time there was a house full of boys who were pretty much "the" boys to know in our singles ward. They were all funny and handsome and had the best music taste ever. I was, of course, completely terrified of all of them. One night I was in the local Tower records and three of them walked in. I froze. I had made a deal with myself that it was OK not to wear myself out at church introducing myself to everyone but if I saw people I recognized out in the real world, I had to work up the nerve to speak to them. And so as the three of them wandered around the store I approached every one of them and struck up a conversation. All of them were super nice and over the years, they continue to be some of my favorite boys on the planet. I still like to tease them that hello-there were THREE of them and ONE of me and yet I had to be the one to make friends first.

Well one of them admitted once that he really, really loved George Michael and it was all I needed to completely indulge a guilty pleasure I had kept secret for years. When he texted me to say he'd taken a special girl to see George Michael in concert, I knew Greg had found his soulmate.

This album is awesome.



2. Cracked Rear View-Hootie and the Blowfish

I really don't know that I need to feel bad about since in the spring of 1995, EVERY ONE LOVED HOOTIE. But like Titanic and President Reagan and shoulder pads-everyone likes to pretend they were too cool. I bought this album with the $20 my dad slipped me when I was going back to school after Spring Break. The computers in the lab all had CD players and I was a brand new internet addict so I spent hours and hours, surfing the net (WHAT was even ON the internet in 1995??) and memorizing every word. I finally saw them live that next summer and Darius Rucker is every bit of amazing live. What a voice.



3. Outside from Redwoods-Kenny Loggins

Again, did you grow up in the eighties? Do you know all the lines to Caddyshack? You loved a Kenny Loggins song at some point and don't lie to me or to yourself. But you probably liked "Danger Zone" or "I'm Alright". I waited until the early 90's when he was in his New Age, environmentalist, uber cheesy years to fall in love with him. This album is live versions of some of his classics and some of his newer (at the time) stuff and I adored it in college. I also used to swoon whenever Peter Brienholt played so you Mormons know what I'm talkin' about.



4. Room for Squares-John Mayer

Oh I looooooooved this album in my mid-twenties. I STILL kind of love this album. John Mayer may be kind of a tool but the guy can play guitar like nobody's business and knows EXACTLY how to write songs that make the ladies swoon. He had a track on the Serendipity soundtrack and I fell pretty hard for it. I bought Room For Squares shortly after I saw the movie and I probably listened to it every single day for six months. It was the year prior to the 2002 Olympics and I loved my job and I loved my apartment and I loved my roommates and I loved feeling like a real live adult. Even now, his voice can take me back to a really great time of my life. I keep buying his albums and they continue to be pretty good-but this will always be my favorite.



5. Greatest Hits 1982-1989-Chicago

I actually feel zero pain about this one. Chicago was responsible for some of the most slow dance friendly music of my junior high and high school life and there can't be a teenager alive who doesn't have some fantastic "You're the Inspiration" moment. My favorite memory of this album was when my friend Jessie's older sister took us toilet papering and we listened to it all the way there and back and thought we were soooo cool and grown up. I've always liked, "Along Comes a Woman". This live version will have to do.

Claim

My friend Mandy made a mix CD several years ago entirely composed of songs she had "reclaimed" from the jaws of a bad association. It's actually one of my favorite mixes of all time and I was happy for her that she managed to get all of those fabulous songs back.

I was driving to work today, flipping through radio stations as I do most mornings (radio haters I don't know what to tell you, I still like it.) and I realized that through no effort on my part, a song that was tearing me up just a few short months ago was back to just being good. I'll probably get dinged for liking this but I'm just going to own it.



It got me thinking about how when you are in the middle of something miserable, it just feels like it will always be awful and you hate hearing that time is eventually going to fix it. And then one day you wake up and realize, not only are you over it, you can't even muster up a good, "if he saw me now he's see how totally over it I am!" fantasy because you simply don't care anymore.

Would there be anything wrong with getting that inked on my forearm so I can read it to myself next time I'm crying my eyes out to wistful country music?

My Face

Has everyone on Facebook pretty much done the 15 meaningful albums off the top of your head list by now? I made my list but now I'm itching to say something about each of them. The idea was that you had to list them quickly, no searching your iTunes or going through your CD collection to find the best albums-just 15 things that came to you naturally. Here we go...

1. Pneumonia-Whiskeytown
My sister sent me this album when I was lonely and homesick in California in the fall of 2002. Her note said that while all the songs were gems on their own, it was an album best enjoyed in it's entirety. This was a couple of years before iTunes crushed our collective ability to listen to anything other than a playlist so I followed her advice. This album is actually kind of sad but it ended up being an enormous comfort during those months when I was tempted every day to run away. It was also my first introduction to Ryan Adams, a love affair that hasn't cooled over the last eight years. This is a live version of "Jacksonville Skyline" and it's beautiful.



2. The Flaming Lips-The Soft Bulletin
In early 2003 my friend Dave sent me an email that said, "my friend Keith lives in LA. He likes music, you like music. You should be friends." He gave Keith my number and the first time he called we talked for 2 1/2 hours. I probably had a crush on him for about five minutes because that's how I function but we soon settled into one of the sweetest and most meaningful friendships of my life. He gave me The Soft Bulletin for Christmas one year and the more I listened to it, the more I adored him. He is married now and about to be a papa but his is still one my favorite names to see in my inbox. You all know this song but I think the lyrics are fabulous and when I saw The Flaming Lips live at Madison Square Gardens for New Year's several years ago it got me all choked up.



3. Heartbreaker-Ryan Adams
Anyone who knows me or reads the blog knows I'm almost irrational in my affection for Ryan Adams. I think he's enormously talented and there are literally dozens of songs between Whiskeytown, the Cardinals and his solo albums that thrill me right down to my toes. There isn't a period of my life in the last eight years that doesn't have a little Ryan woven into it. Here's a lovely one from Heartbreaker, a perfect album if ever there was one.



4. Yankee Hotel Foxtrot-Wilco
Again, a little credit to my sister Emily here. She made me a mix CD that included "Jesus, etc". I have never once skipped this song when it cycles through iTunes, I have put it on every mix CD I make for boys I like, I sang along to this song at that same New Year's show in NYC with a sold out crowd. The whole album is terrific and the story of how it almost didn't happen is worth checking out. But this song will always be the standout to me.

don't cry
you can rely on me honey
you can come by any time you want
I'll be around
you were right about the stars
each one is a setting sun



5. August and Everything After-Counting Crows
Oh the Counting Crows. Oh this album. Oh freshman year of college. A pattern in my life seems to be that I kind of hate the first two or three months of any new and exciting adventure-college, mission, California, Boston...apparently I need to be miserable for a bit before I can really enjoy anything. August and Everything After came out my senior year of high school and I really connected with it. I took the CD to college and played it and played it and played it. To this day, the first few bars of "Round Here" will instantly take me back to my goofy little College Way apartment in Cedar City.



6. Crash-Dave Matthews Band
I was a nanny for a few summers in college and spent a fair amount of time in Chicago with eight kids, three dogs and divorcing parents. It was a zoo to say the least. One of the daughters was only a few years younger than me and we got to be good friends. We spent an inordinate amount of time driving kids around and Ashley had a CD of "Crash" that we would listen to almost exclusively. It cracked us up to teach the little Vasya and Ola the lyrics to all these adult songs. And then I liked to listen to it in the rare moments I got to myself and be glad that I was a carefree college girl and not anyone's mom. There is a Dave Matthews album for my sophomore, junior and senior year of college but this one will always be my very favorite. "Say Goodbye" is a stand out since at any given time I had a crush on one of my guy friends.



7. Give Up-The Postal Service
In the space of about three months, three different people put "Such Great Heights" on mix CD's for me. It happened to be a time in my life when I was reevaluating my tastes in everything from jobs to clothes to music to boys and The Postal Service was a band I might have been too afraid to like before that summer. Keith and I saw their very first show at a little club in San Diego and two years later a boy who would go on to shatter my heart quoted the lyrics "I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images" in a moment that I later managed to settle into a sweet memory.



8. Tracy Chapman-Tracy Chapman
Oh what to say about Tracy Chapman..."Fast Car" came out when I was in elementary school and I would scour the radio waiting to hear it. I wasn't totally sure what the lyrics were all about but I knew it was sad and at 11 or 12, that's kind of your favorite thing. When I was in high school I got the CD in one of those Columbia Records 12 for 1 deals and played it nearly to death. My favorites tracks on this album have changed over the years, it always manages to feel new to me. This is one I used to skip when I was younger but as I've gotten older, find to be incredibly romanatic. I love these lines

Deep in my heart
Safe from the guards
Of intellect and reason
Leaving me at a loss
For words to express my feelings



9. Fumbling Towards Ecstasy-Sarah Machlachlan
Were you a girl in America in the mid to late nineties? Then you have some sort of connection to Sarah Machlachlan. I guess it probably doesn't seem this way anymore since she played the Opening Ceremonies at the Olympics but 15 years ago, Sarah was edgy and liking her made me feel like I was growing up (I was 18!). I bought Fumbling Torwards Ecstasy at a record store after-cliche alert!-a boy broke my heart. Years later, Megan used Sarah Machlachlan to track Felicity's feelings for Ben in an episode of one my all time favorite television shows. Mary is a pretty song that still makes me feel better even when my heart is in good shape.



10. Sufjan Stevens-Greetings From Michigan
I don't even know who first told me about this guy. It just seemed like there was a month a few years ago where everyone was talking about him. It's hard to explain what he sounds like, you just kind of need to trust the person recommending him and just listen. I love that he's a religious guy and he's not shy about weaving spiritual themes into his music but he's uber talented enough that it doesn't ever come off as cheesy Christian rock. This song is not from the album noted above but it's a cover of my favorite hymn and it makes me cry almost every time I hear it. He does a brilliant job of making it his own, and the words have always felt like it was written just for me.



11. Florence and the Machine-Lungs
I've already written about this one recently. Great album, been in my ears a lot lately. Reminds me of someone I maybe have a little crush on.



12. Trouble-Ray Lamontagne
I used to participate pretty regularly in an internet message board. It was started by a bunch of my brother's friends from high school and was essentially a cyber hang out for kids who wanted to talk about music and politics and religion and movies and relationships with friends who were spread out all over the country. Everyone kept inviting people and soon we had a pretty active network of folks sharing their favorite albums in the same space they shared their fears about life and questions about their beliefs. It was a fascinating little society and although I don't participate anymore, I made some lifelong offline friends there and got literally hundreds of amazing music suggestions. One of them was from Jeff in Tennessee who might have sold his soul to the devil to get his impeccable taste. He told me if I liked Ryan Adams, I would like Ray LaMontagne and I bought the CD at Newbury Comics on my way home from work that very day. Every. single. track. kills. I think he keeps getting better and his new album has been my permanent driving soundtrack for a few weeks now but I still adore this album. Here's one of the many keepers.




13. Grace-Jeff Buckley
I really can't remember when I bought this album. I just know that Jeff Buckley has a voice that is other-worldly. My favorite song is "Last Goodbye" and the lyric, "kiss me out of desire baby, not consolation" pretty much slays me everytime.



14. The Bends-Radiohead
I almost didn't put this one on my list because I'm sure somewhere on "Stuff White People Like" there is an entry on "pretentious rock bands, i.e. Radiohead". But whatever, this truly is an album that means a lot to me. It took me a loooooooong time to warm up to these guys. I had tried-every single person I trusted would get almost reverent when they talked about Radiohead. But I just never really got it. Then I got a mix (you knew that was coming right?) with Fake Plastic Trees on it. I was letting the whole thing play while I was out for a run on the beach one afternoon and it was like this song just exploded into my head, took root and wouldn't leave. I asked my friend Jayd at church that week which Radiohead album I should start with, he said it was a controversial choice but definitely The Bends and I never looked back. I finally got to see them live with my friend Linda a few years ago in Boston and when they played Idioteque we both nearly fainted.



15. Broken Social Scene-You Forgot it in People
I think I have mentioned this before but for all the wonderful blessings I have in my life in terms of family and friends and jobs and opportunities, I have a pretty terrible relationship record. I was thinking about that the other night-not feeling any particular sadness, just looking at the facts of my age and my relative lack of real relationship experience. So then I started counting sweet romantic moments and thought that perhaps I've had more than my share of those over the years and maybe I'll take them over the series of painful breakups a normal 33 year old ought to have had.

One of those fabulous moments was when all the planets aligned and put me in San Francisco for work on the very birthday of the boy I was stupidly trying to date while living in Boston. It also happened that a band we both loved was playing that night and fifteen of our friends wanted to see them too. So we enjoyed a perfect show, with a bunch of people we loved and then spent the rest of the night laughing and talking and catching up at my hotel. He had brought a couple of CD's for me which is truly the best thing a boy can ever do. One of them included a Broken Social Scene song. People had been CRAZY RAVING about BSS and their self titled album for almost a year at that point and I just hadn't ever bothered to listen to it. "Lover's Spit" completely changed my mind and I became one of those raving lunatic fans as well. I still consider them one of my all time favorite bands, that discovery night ranks pretty highly as well. I saw that boy again last weekend in California and even though it's been six years and we've both certainly moved on-I still feel an enormous amount of affection for him and for what a delight our time together was.


I could on for days with this stuff but I'll obey the meme and leave it at 15.

p.s. Yes, Miss Katie, for sure there are albums that I might not want to brag about that meant a lot. John Mayer, Taylor Swift, Kenny Loggins. Maybe next I'll do a guilty pleasures top 15 ; )

Stalker

Ah Monday, you are always such a weird day. So here is a delightfully weird song that I fell in love with this weekend. It's totally about a stalker but still manages to be such a fun song.

Flashback

Twelve years ago at this time I was living in France and working for my church as a missionary. One night pretty early on, a nice American couple in our congregation invited my companion and I over for dinner. The wife promised familiar food and I was really excited about a night of my head not exploding from trying to understand all the rapid fire French around me.

We had a perfectly lovely time and it felt nice to talk to people who could related to some of the things we felt homesick about. Then they started talking about their upstairs neighbors-a Muslim family that they sort of jokingly but sort of not thought might be terrorists. They told us a couple of stories-a knife dropped onto their patio from upstairs once, and those people sure have a lot of visitors and meetings in their apartment-and we politely listened and rolled our eyes after we left but it left a sort of nasty taste in my mouth.

We had some extra time after dinner and before we needed to be home so we decided to knock on a few doors in the building since that is pretty much what missionaries do with any extra time. After plenty of slammed doors we found ourselves at the apartment directly above the American couple. A nice looking Middle Eastern guy answered and said he would love to talk about God with us. He quickly told us that he was Muslim and not interested in converting but he was chatty and we were tired of rejection so we spent a few minutes visiting with him. He was new to the area and it came up early in the conversation that he was pretty sure all his neighbors assumed he was a terrorist because his family was Muslim. I can still clearly remember his frustrated face when he said, "I have a wife and a baby! Do I look like a terrorist to you?" He did not, if fact, look like a terrorist to me. And sadly, he was not the only Muslim I had a conversation with in my 18 months in France and Switzerland who told a similar story.

Being a missionary means hearing a LOT of people say say a LOT of stupid things to your face about your religious beliefs. People told us we were members of a cult, that our religion was just a sect, that we were secret polygamists, that our leaders were evil and trying to control us. People will say things with such authority, as if they know better what you believe than you do. We had people quit letting us come over because they read horrible things on the internet about "the mormons", or their friends warned them that we would brainwash them if they joined us. I knew that people in France weren't going to know much about Mormons but I was still so shocked and disappointed at how ignorant and hateful people could be about something they really knew nothing about.

So although I respect that everyone gets to have their own opinion about some of the current political hot buttons, I feel that same sense of shock and disappointment when I hear much of the public conversation about who should and shouldn't be able to worship according to the dictates of their own consciences. It wasn't so long ago that there was an extermination order out for my very own ancestors because people didn't trust what they might be up to.

Flying back to the United States after a year and a half abroad was amazing. We flew past the Statue of Liberty before landing at JFK and I cried. I loved my time in Europe and I met amazing people, but I'm delighted to be an American. To me this is a country of freedom and of hope and of respect and of understanding. A country where we all get to believe what we want, and talk to God in the way that we want, and gather with like minded folks in the places that we want. I feel like if we all really believed that and acted that way, it would be the very best kind of memorial to those who died nine years ago today.

Give Up

Sometimes I am late to a really great party. So stop me if you've heard this one. Mumford & Sons is absolutely one of the best bands of 2010. I had heard a few of their songs and was decently obsessed but Sunday night, one of the guys at the house was playing clips for people and my heart almost stopped when he got to this one. It's just brilliant. The lyrics, the melody-just listen and make sure you can turn it up.



Happy Friday all!

I Feel Home When I See Faces That Remember My Own

I'm always a bit sad to see Labor Day weekend arrive since it means saying goodbye to summer. Summer and I really love each other and yet it passes too fast and I never do all the things I said I was going to do and I end up feeling vaguely unsatisfied for most of the weekend.

However, this summer was pretty alright. Races and hikes and trips and fun visitors and plenty of flirting-I am pretty pleased with what summer 2010 brought. Corey had talked me into topping it off with a quick weekend trip to California to hang out in some beach houses our friend Carin was organizing.

I flew into LAX and as soon as Corey and Eliza picked me up we started laughing and pretty didn't stop until I left on Tuesday.

I will spare you the travelogue especially since I posted plenty of silly photos and obnoxious inside joke status updates on Facebook but the trip was pretty fabulous. It was great to catch up with a lot of old friends and to make some new ones. We went four wheeling and saw Hearst Castle and ate good food and I finally FINALLY went on a vacation where I got to dance as much as my little heart wanted. I faced my kareoke fears and got to sing Journey at the top of my lungs. I overdosed on single mormon friends which I don't really have much of here in the Springs. I have said this before and I will say it again-I am ridiculously and embarrassingly spoiled when it comes to the quantity and quality of good people in my life.

Maybe the best part of the trip however was getting a little bit of time in my beloved Huntington Beach. It is not the prettiest beach in Orange County and the city itself is a bit sleepy but I am just crazy in love with that place. My intention all those eight years ago when I packed up my car and drove out to California was to be an LA girl. But the minute I walked into the chapel in HB to go to church with my friend Racie, I felt like I was home home home. Those first six months were rough as I faced the reality of my first adult move away from home without the safety net of college or a mission. I spent many nights in my bedroom on Brookhurst and Hamilton wondering what on earth I had been thinking. I trained for the marathon that helped pull me out of my homesickness in that town. I rebuilt a network of friends, I advanced in my job. I made a scary decision there to leave and start over again in Boston and when I came back two years later, HB was a place to relax and breathe after a stressful East Coast experience.

I know Colorado is the right place for me now and as I'm creeping up on my year anniversary in this place (cheesy blog post on it's way folks), I am the happiest I have been in a long, long time. But Huntington Beach will always make me a little wistful for days when a bike was the best way to get to the pier and sand was the best thing to run on and the sound of ocean waves out my window was the best natural white noise machine. I may be in an adult relationship with Colorado now but it will always feel like a teenage fantasy that HB was my first.

Hiatus

Tomorrow I am headed up to Boulder to hang out with my friend Alex who is finally home after a long summer away and then I'm off to spend a day in Huntington Beach trying to get through Fiesta Grill, TK Burger and Carnitas without getting food poisoning (see: March 2009),and finally Corey, Eliza, Sara and I will head up to Pismo beach where we will sit on the beach for four lovely days and pretend we are the stars of a bad Katy Perry song.

I'm sure I will have much to say when I get home. Happy Labor Day everyone!!

Home

Well I'm in love with THIS, that is for sure.



These lyrics are knocking me right between the eyes.

Her:
Alabama, Arkansas
I do love my ma and pa
Not that way that I do love you

Him:
Holy moley, me oh my
You're the apple of my eye
Girl, I've never loved one like you

Her:
Man, oh man, you're my best friend
I scream it to the nothingness
There ain't nothing that I need

Him:
Well, hot and heavy, pumpkin pie
Chocolate candy, Jesus Christ
Ain't nothing please me more than you

Both:
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is wherever I'm with you
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is wherever I'm with you

La, la, la, la, take me home
Mother, I'm coming home

Him:
I'll follow you into the park
Through the jungle, through the dark
Girl, I never loved one like you

Her:
Moats and boats and waterfalls
Alleyways and pay phone calls
I've been everywhere with you

Him:
That's true
Laugh until we think we'll die
Barefoot on a summer night
Never could be sweeter than with you

Her:
And in the streets you run a-free
Like it's only you and me
Geez, you're something to see

Both:
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is wherever I'm with you
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is wherever I'm with you

La, la, la, la, take me home
Daddy, I'm coming home

(talking)
Him: Jade
Her: Alexander
Him: Do you remember that day you fell out of my window?
Her: I sure do, you came jumping out after me
Him: Well, you fell on the concrete, nearly broke your ass, you were bleeding all over the place and I rushed you out to the hospital, you remember that?
Her: Yes, I do
Him: Well, there's something I never told you about that night
Her: What didn't you tell me?
Him: While you were sitting in the backseat smoking a cigarette you thought was going to be your last, I was falling deep, deeply in love with you, and I never told you until just now

Both:
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is wherever I'm with you
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is where I'm alone with you

Him:
Home
Let me come home
Home is wherever I'm with you

Her:
Ah, home
Yes I am home
Home is when I'm alone with you

Her:
Alabama, Arkansas
I do love my ma and pa
Moats and boats and waterfalls
Alleyways and pay phone calls

Both:
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is wherever I'm with you
Ah, home
Let me go home
Home is where I'm alone with you

Bored

With summer on it's way out, I'm trying to figure out what winter activity Colorado can introduce me too once it's too cold and icy for any of the things I am doing now.

Maybe snowboarding? This is my friend Alex, I totally think he can teach me to do this too.

Hippies

Last week was kind of insane. We have a sale after every Olympics to get rid of all the extra gear we end up when the Games are over and we invite all the athletes, USOC employees and staff from the local National Governing Bodies. Needless to say, it's a giant event and guess who had the pleasure of running the thing?

I was tired yesterday. I slept for about ten hours which was really nice, got a haircut, helped my friend Heather move and did a visit for church. But I felt guilty all day that although I had been running around like crazy all week, I hadn't really done any kind of good exercise in six days and for sure hadn't done anything active that I enjoyed. So when my friend Tom mentioned while we were lifting boxes out of a U-Haul that he was going to do the incline that night with some people, I invited myself along.

Turns out Tom and his three friends were in outstanding shape and I probably had no business trying to keep up with them, but there I was and I certainly wasn't going to complain or lag behind. I ended up shaving about five minutes off my usual time which felt good mentally but made me feel like my heart, lungs and maybe even kidney were going to explode at the top. By the time we got up it was already dark which meant we ran down the trail by moonlight. Aside from the risk of tripping on a tree branch or rock you absolutely cannot see, running downhill at night is every bit of thrilling. We got down to the bottom and decided that even though we were sweaty and smelly, we should reward ourselves with a really great dinner. We sat outside and ate delicious things and talked about all sorts of things. I love meeting people who go from being strangers to friends almost instantly and that's exactly what happened last night. After dinner we decided we weren't ready for the evening to end so we slipped over to the playground next to the restaurant and played on the swings, hung on the monkey bars, climbed a tree and went down the slide. At about 11, totally worn out and doing a little stretching on the grass, a group of scruffy hippie looking kids approached us and asked if we were doing yoga. We said not really but we can! So we formed a big circle and started a late night yoga flash mob. It was a perfect way to end such an organically fun night.

Summer, can't you stay forever?

Firesale

One of my very favorite phrases on earth is "have you heard of this band? I think you would like them." Another one of my favorite things on earth is making a new really good friend. So you combine the two of them and well, this girl is pretty much in heaven.

I have NO IDEA how this artist escaped my radar screen-especially since one review said Florence and the Machine is what it would sound like if Adele and Kate Nash had musical offspring. I love those two and now I love Florence so much I'm not listening to much else. And it doesn't hurt a new friendship for someone to nail my tastes so well. This is my favorite track off the album "Lungs" but really, it's loaded with good stuff. Her voice is so awesome it makes me wish I could trade everything I was good at for that one talent.

Meet the Fockers

Sister came this weekend.



And she brought husb.


We had a delightful weekend and I am pretty sure I can count on Emily to post more and better photos than I have so I'll just direct you to her link at some point.

We always have so much fun together, it's delightful to have someone around who wears clothes I can steal and who laughs the same way I do and who likes to drink Diet Dr. Pepper late at night and sleep in like I do.

So I wasn't sure how it would change a sister visit now that she's hitched and all. This whole "brother-in-law" thing is still a little new. You would think that having three biological brothers would mean it was no big deal to add another Y chromosome to the family. But I'll confess I was a bit apprehensive. Even when I talk too much, or cry when they tease me, or say stupid things or post to Facebook too often-my brothers are still required by family law to like me. A brother-in-law is under no such obligation and since I really prefer that people like me rather than simply put up with me, I wanted to win Aaron over.

I'm pretty sure I still talk too much and he will probably never quit teasing me about how much I love to update my status but I'm definitely sold on brothers-in-law. Aaron came in handy for finding a breakfast spot, getting us out on our bikes, answering ALL my computer questions, providing my weekend teasing quota, taking endless photos AND helping me finally buy a television which I still can't believe I waited almost a year to do. He's good for my sister and maybe the weirdest thing about the whole weekend was how it didn't feel weird at all to add him to the mix. My siblings sure have done a terrific job choosing mates-I certainly have my work cut out for me if I intend to bring one board.


It's friday and I'm in a particularly good mood for a variety of reasons-but the one I will share with all of you is that my sister-in-law is bringing nephew to town this weekend and I'm pretty excited that I don't have to share them with the rest of the family! I found this clip of 13 great songs from 2009 that I can't stop listening to-every single one of these is worth looking up on it's own. I'm OBSESSED with that Discovery song "So Insane." Check it out and happy weekend!

Tantrum

Two things I love to do on a cross-country flight:

1. Read the latest Vanity Fair cover to cover
2. Catch up on all the podcasts stacking up in my iTunes

Last Sunday night I was flying to New York and after I finished hearing what Angelina thinks about "Brad, the kids and giving up acting", I turned on the KCRW's Top Tune podcast. The first song was a new LCD Soundsystem track that was pretty good but I was still browsing the magazine a little bit while I listened. And then. What happened next was one of those things I absolutely love about music and one of the reasons I never get tired of it-a song burst into my ears that made it next to impossible to sit still in my seat. I have been on this neo-soul kick recently and this little tune hit me right between the eyes. It's by a little band called Fitz and the Tantrums and the album doesn't come out until later this month so you'll have to settle for this little live version.




I'm now officially OBSESSED with these guys. Perfect perfect summertime music.

Summer in the City

Last Goodbye

Obviously I would love all my siblings regardless of how impressive they all were.

But sometimes I look at all of them and think "hot damn! what a family! Because sometimes my little sister's perspective on life is brilliant.

And sometimes my younger brothers kick butt at hard things.

And sometimes the baby is brave and sells her art to strangers.

And sometimes the one just younger than me who thinks he's just older than me is terribly google-able.

That's some DNA worth selling right there. I may be on a bit of a hiatus next week...headed to NYC for some work meetings and to check in with some old friends. And to satisfy that little itch for crowds and shopping and men in suits that COS can't quite scratch.

Six O'Clock

I had a party for myself when I turned 30. Because you can do that kind of stuff when you get old. My friend Mark brought his poor married guy cousin to the party and said cousin spent most of the evening talking to my mother in the kitchen. They were the only married redheads at the party so it was fitting. My mother discoverd that cousin was a musician and within a few weeks, we had developed something of a family fan club. In the past few months, he and his band The Madison Arm have covered two of my favorite songs and they are both just beautiful. It's rainy in the Springs today and kind of grey, these are fitting songs for the slightly moody state I am in.





The fact that this guy isn't famous kind of confuses me frankly.

Class of 94

My mom recently moved into a house with less storage and so I have re-inherited all of the boxes of childhood memories that have been sitting in her basement for about fifteen years.

If you have been out of high school at least ten years, I will tell you that a very funny evening activity is to take your yearbook, look up boys you had crushes on or people who intimidated you and then find them on Facebook. Take note sophomore self-in fifteen years most of these guys you are losing sleep over will be someone's dad and you my dear will be quite fulfilled with what has happened in your own life.

High school was a funny time for me. I wanted what just about every adolescent girl wants-boys to like me and to be popular. I failed spectacularly on both fronts but reading my old yearbook messages, it is nice to remind myself that apparently I did have some good times and some fun friends.

So high school has been on my mind this week and then we watched Pirate Radio last night and that fabulous soundtrack got Otis Redding on my mind. Which obviously led to me looking up one of the greatest scenes in teen cinematic history-Duckie's performance of "Try a Little Tenderness" in "Pretty in Pink".



It has bothered me ever since I reached adulthood that Molly Ringwald's character ends up with the jerky rich kid at the end of this movie instead of the Duck-man. The story goes that the original plan was to end the movie with Andie and Duckie together but test audiences HATED that and so they changed it and she kisses Andrew McCarthy in the parking lot (one of the WORST kissing scenes EVER by the way). This after he was a complete loser and backed out on dating her because his popular friend disapproved. I get so mad every single time I watch it that audiences were so stupid in the 80's that they wanted her to end up with the rich, handsome dude at all costs. Any girl who was ever 16 and complaining about why the cutest boy in the 10th grade didn't notice her probably heard her mother say at least one hundred times, "you will be so surprised when the boys you think are nerds now turn out to be the best adults."

I watch Pretty in Pink now and I think that Duckie probably grew up to be a really interesting adult and Blane (Blane!!) is probably mostly bald and boring and having an affair with his secretary. Which is not to say that kids who were cool in high school are all lame adults. Pretty much all the rest of my siblings managed to climb about ten rungs higher on the teenage food chain than I ever did, but it is wildly interesting to me to look at where people are now and to see how little your High School popularity index has to do with, well, anything. But what also occurs to me when I watch that movie, or when I browse the old high school yearbooks, is that perhaps it's precisely the ratio of struggling to feel good about yourself you do at a young age that corresponds to how you "turn out". As Jack once told Liz on 30 Rock, "I don't know what happened to you as a child that led you to develop humor as a defense mechanism but I'm grateful for it."

I hope my future daughters realize that I'm going to be advocating for boys like the computer club president or the captain of some totally uncool sport. And probably teaching my sons to do a REALLY good Otis Redding impression.

Small World

About ten years ago I was working on my very first Short Track Speed Skating World Cup. We were working on the list of VIP accreditation and my boss told us to add two for "USOC Reps". I was so nervous to have people from the Olympic Committee at my first event! So of course we took really good care of them and they were really nice and end of story.

So about two months ago I saw this woman in the office who only comes in once a week. Her face and her name felt really familiar and I realized hey, she's that USOC lady from the Short Track event! So I sort of nervously asked her if she had been in Provo for that World Cup and she laughed and said yes. Turns out her husband had been a skater and a coach and back then Speedskating was one of the sports she managed.

We ended up hitting it off and I found out she is some kind of CRAZY cyclist/runner/swimming fiend who seriously does at least two of those things every single day. In between being a kick ass mom and working one day a week for us. Girl crush to say the least. Yesterday she emailed to see if I wanted to do a bike ride tonight after work. She and my boss are friends so the three of us ended up heading out together.

I probably should have known when I got to her house ON A HILL and we headed DOWN that hill that um-the very end up of our ride would be a somewhat brutal climb. That doesn't really say great things about the rest of the ride now does it?

We did 27 miles and she made sure to take us on one of nastiest hills in Colorado Springs. There were several points at which I weighed the embarrassment of telling them they would need to come back for me with the fact that my lungs were straight going to explode. Instead I put my head down and kept grinding and felt like a complete rock star when I came up over the last bump and her husband told us how tough we were.

It was a great ride and I probably have lots to say about how this might be the healthiest era of my life and how much I am enjoying finding my inner athlete. But mostly it was just fun to think about how you absolutely never know how and when people will float in and out of your life. And how glad I am that I learned from a young age by watching my mother that it's better to be nice to people. They might come back in ten years in kick your butt on a random Tuesday...in the best possible way.

Prize Fighter

I don't usually like to repost funny stuff from the internet on my blog but this happens to feature a friend of mine AND it's hilarious so...for your Monday viewing pleasure:

The Jane Austen Fight Club



(Emma is my friend Farrah, I'm glad I know not to mess with her!)

Feel free to share...it's burning it's way across the web today.

This just in...also directed by a dear old friend, one Mr. Keith Paugh. Crazy talented fella, happy to see some of his work getting so much attention.

Kids in the Hall

Who needs kids of their own when you have these to spoil and then give back to their parents?



This week was completely bonkers. The first ever Youth Olympic Games are next month in Singapore and we had 125 athletes and staff to outfit. It's been kind of a zoo as you can imagine.

My summer of Colorado exploration continues tonight as I head to Steamboat Springs with some girlfriends. We're going to sit in hot pools, float down the river, run a 5K, hike, bike, and probably take a photo or two. Is anything better than summer?

Kid Rock

Dear Morgan,

Two years ago tonight your Aunt Katie was having a pretty big day. She took a private plane with the Chief Marketing Officer of a great big shoe company to New York for a big party she planned to open a very cute little store in SoHo. It was a very cool party and all kinds of fancy people from trendy magazines came and danced and drank lots of free beers and told us how darling our store was. I kept my blackberry close that night because I was waiting for some other big news as well. I was in the middle of a conversation when I felt the vibration of phone in my pocket. A message from my sister, "larrybird is here!"

I imagine your parents have told you that we called you larrybird for most of the time your momma was growing you. I had to go right back to that party and pretend that I was glowing over sneakers and rubber boots but for about ten minutes, I stood on a street corner in Manhattan and thought about how I would never forget that moment and how someday I would get to tell you that you managed to upstage one of the major milestone days of my career.

You are turning two today and it seems like pretty much everything is different than it was when you were born. You got a little brother, a cousin, and a new uncle. All your dad's siblings AND several of your grandparents have moved to new cities or houses or jobs. Maybe you were the catalyst for a lot of nice things happening to so many of us. You were progress Morgan. A brand new invention, something we'd never had in our family before. And now there are more little Clifford babies for us to adore and overphotograph and brag about, but you will always be our first.

I found out what a nephew was in kindergarten when my friend Ryan, whose brothers and sisters were all VERY OLD, brought one for Show and Tell. I was the oldest so it seemed like it would be a long time before we had any in our own family. In the meantime, every human being I knew became and aunt or uncle and blabbed on and on about how great nieces and nephews were. Now I like kids just plenty but I was always just a little suspect about how great they could really be. And then I met you. And i haven't been able to stop buying tiny LeBron James high tops and stuffed monkey's and miniature hoodies for you. You and your cousin are the background on my phone, your face is all over my fridge, you are in more frames in my house than your parents are.

You have plenty of people there in Utah who love you and I know when I come around it's always a struggle to remember who I am and to figure out why I seem to like you so much. I had a different kind of crazy day at work today, in Denver, not New York. But I got funny texts from your Grandma and called your dad and saw a photo of the fabulous cake your mom made for your big day. It's funny for me to think about you running around Murray Park today-completely oblivious to how many people adore you and have all kinds of dreams and hopes for you.

So on your second birthday, indulge me a few auntie style wishes.

-I hope you keep demanding that your parents let you watch the US Open on The Golf Channel
-I hope when you start talking, your miraculously have a slight spanish accent
-I hope you learn to dribble before you learn how to read
-I hope one day you will sing "hot dog hot dog hot diggity dog" on my voicemail
-I hope that your Aunt Emily posts photos from your birthday party before I am dead

Mostly Morgan, I hope you know how lucky we are that you came to our family. I love you so much that I say ridiculous things like "i want to eat that baby!" when I get photos of you. You have reduced me to the personification of every dumb aunt cliche and I don't even care. I post photos of you, I show people funny videos of you acting like a chicken, I squeeze you to pieces when I see you even though you look at me like I'm a space alien.

I love you Morgan, and it thrills me to my toes that I get to be your Aunt for pretty much the rest of forever. Happy happy birthday you little weasel.

Sign of the Times

I must finally be getting either 1) old or 2) responsible because despite the fact that I have loads to write about and it's only 10:14, I am going to put myself to bed so I can be a well rested and productive member of society tomorrow.

Something is wrong.

Payoff

Take a look at this list of Emmy Nominations and see if you can figure out why I am so excited today:

Best actor in a drama

Bryan Cranston, "Breaking Bad"
Michael C. Hall, "Dexter"
Kyle Chandler, "Friday Night Lights"
Hugh Laurie, "House"
Matthew Fox, "Lost"
Jon Hamm, Mad Men

Best actress in a drama

Kyra Sedgwick, "The Closer"
Glenn Close, "Damages"
Connie Britton, "Friday Night Lights"
Julianna Margulies, "The Good Wife"
Mariska Hargitay, "Law and Order SVU"
January Jones, "Mad Men"

Tony Award

I'd like to take you on a little tour of the random ways a person can end up downloading a small fortune from iTunes in an astonishingly short period of time.

Last night I was watching "It's Complicated" while I worked on a few projects and wound down from my weekend. The movie was pretty good but the soundtrack was outstanding. It opens with a Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young song that I could identify as them but couldn't seem to find the title. I Googled it about ten times but the song that kept coming back didn't seem right. So I called the one guy who I knew could figure out what I was looking for-my dad. I sang the part I liked from the movie and he said "oh you mean Judy Blue Eyes? The best seven and a half minutes in music?". Ladies and gentlemen, is it crystal clear where I got it?? So we talked about how awesome Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young are for awhile and then I went back to watching the movie.
Turns out I did know the song but I actually thought it was two different songs. The whole thing IS worth a listen but it's right around 6:35 that I was so obsessed with last night. Like so obsessed I want to put that minute on a loop and throw a dance party where that is all we play. Download #1.



So then there is a scene with Meryl Streep and Alec Baldwin having dinner that ends in laughing and dancing and there are several songs in a row that had me so excited. First it was this John Legend gem that I already own and have always loved. My favorite lyric is "love hurts sometimes when you do it right".



Then it was Joss Stone who I always forget I really like. This one is maybe a little more "wealthy white people falling in love in New York" then I normally love but there was something so danceable and happy about it, I pretty much HAD to download it. #2



I decided to finish the rest of the movie at that point and wait until the end to do some more searching. So the next thing I looked up was from that same scene and was by Raphael Saadiq. I knew his name but hadn't really ever listened to him. In a sort of odd twist of musical fate-I had downloaded some Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings earlier in the day (yep, I am an addict people) and he was on the "you might also like" section of the iTunes store. So I downloaded "Love That Girl" without even listening to a sample. #3



Does that voice sound sort of vaguely familiar to anyone else? I did my standard wikipedia search that I always do on new artist and OMG! Raphael Saadiq is actually Raphael Wiggins of Tony! Toni! Tone! He was lead vocals on this piece of R & B perfection from my youth...



So maybe I ended up picking up this, "Let's Get Down" and "Anniversary". I already own "It Never Rains (in Southern California)". I think I have mentioned before that I am a sucker for the other clips that run down the side of your You Tube selection and I got lost in about 30 minutes of New Edition. I actually thought I had this one already but I didn't. Now I do.



When I was sixteen and my parents let me paint my bedroom I listened almost exclusively to New Edition's Greatest Hits and "Homebase" by DJ Jazzy Jeff and Fresh Prince. A memory that made me realize I didn't own "Summertime" which *might* be one of the greatest summer songs of all time. So I bought that too. We are up to 8 at this point.

I went back for a little more Saadiq..



Which lead me to some Anthony Hamilton



And then I realized maybe I should go to bed when I got here a few hops later



Because I could probably actually drown under the weight of nostalgia for the gloriousness that was 1997-98. But just for good measure I downloaded this



Ah Toad the Wet Sprocket. Why didn't I already own this song?

And so that my friends is how I kill and evening AND part with about $15 without even trying.

June Bug

Oh hey, it's the 4th of July already-does anyone else feel like 2010 is the Usain Bolt of years??

June certainly had a lot going for it-the Wasatch Back Relay and getting to meet my new nephew , the trip to Portland, a site visit to London, an old friend making a pit stop on her great escape from Provo to New York...and it still managed to outdo itself.

Some highlights...

-My nephew Wyatt Mark is a doll-baby. Holding a newborn just never gets old. My little brother being the father of two children also never stops taking my breath away. He and Tasha are so good at making kids I think they shouldn't stop until they have a baseball team.
-Wyatt's big brother Morgan gets funnier every time I see him. I took him some tiny LeBron James high tops I picked up in Portland and got my first unsolicited hugs from the guy. He was so excited that we ran, kicked the soccer ball and dribbled in the house to try out the new kicks. He's still not so sure about me but I think we both learned an important lesson about the value of a good bribe. I always sort of fantasized about being the fun aunt who gave the kids fun toys but always figured that as the oldest, I certainly wouldn't be the auntie before I was the mommy. Fate, you have a wicked sense of humor.
-The Wasatch Back was fabulous as usual. It's such a thrill that the thing my siblings like to do together is something so active and that takes us through the most stunning parts of our home state. The best news of this year's race is that all this training in Colorado and doing that infernal Incline once a week without fail meant that I ran my legs in my fastest times ever. And I felt really fantastic too. My second leg started at 12:30 at night and was a little over six miles long. I was totally alone for most of it, just me, my headlamp and my playlist. I really can't think of many things I've ever done that make me feel more like I am truly living than those night runs. If you haven't done one of these races, and you like running even a little bit-just DO IT.
-Post race we finally did what I've been dreaming of since the first year and stayed up in Park City at a fancy hotel with a hot tub and big comfy beds. It was just as dreamy as I hoped it would be and it had better be a tradition...are you listening siblings?
-I got back from Utah on a Sunday night and sort of forgot we'd be leaving for London so quickly. But before I left, it turned out my sister-in-law Kristen would be in Denver on her very first business trip. I drove up to take her out to dinner and oddly, three couples from college-including the lovely Jane who was here in May for the dance competition-also happened to be in Denver for the Sox-Rockies series. So Kristen and I met up with them after the game and I got to catch up with all of them. I hadn't seen Troy and Daphne in probably ten years but there is something about your college people-they always feel so familiar. Jane posted an awfully cute photo of all of us here. I promise no one has aged a day. Good people, great families-lucky lucky me to be able to steal a little time with them.
-London was a delight. I got to spend a good chunk of time in the school we are going to use to process the athletes in 2012. We saw a bunch of venues and then spent a couple of days just getting to know the city. I am enjoying my Colorado home more by the second but oh boy is there ever a city girl in my soul. I love the crowds, I love the Tube, I love the shopping, I love the energy. I can't wait to keep going back and kind of can't believe I have a job that is going to allow that!
-The highlight of the trip was getting to sneak off one night and say hello to my friend Danny from my Boston days, and my friend Monica from my HB days, both of whom are now living in London. And then walking into the pub and running smack into my friend Troy from my SUU days who happens to be there taking a class during his break from law school. Epic.

-In yet another random coincidence, on our way back from London we had a layover in Denver. I was scanning Facebook and noticed my friend Alex also happened to be at DIA and his flight was delayed. I texted, he called and within 10 minutes we were catching up in an airport bar.
-I landed in Colorado Springs and my friend Heather texted to see if I was up for the Incline. I was tired and jet lagged but I had workout clothes and a headlamp with me so I went to her house instead of home and up we went. It's awfully satisfying to choose pushing yourself over going home and passing out.

Which brings me to this 4th of July weekend. It's been such a busy busy few months that I flat forgot to make any sort of plans for the 4th of July. I toyed with going to Huntington and considered a road trip of some sort but in the end, decided to just stay put.

Well sorta. As you may know, Colorado is rather full of places you have all heard of what with all the skiing they do here. Breckenridge, Aspen, Vail, Steamboat Springs, Durango, Grand Junction...the list kind of goes on and on and I figure I really ought to take advantage of my time here and do some exploring. So I talked my friend Greg into just hitting the road yesterday. We sort of made a plan but mostly, we just got in the car and headed out of town. We atarted by driving to the top of Pike's Peak. I was ONLY willing to drive it after Greg pinky swore that we would get some people together and climb the thing before summer's end. Do I even need to say that the view from 14,000 feet is spectacular? These are the views that inspired Katharine Lee Bates to write America the Beautiful back in the late 1800's-a fact I didn't know until yesterday.




After Pike's Peak, we headed West and then North and stopped in Leadville. They have a pretty famous bike race and 100 mile run there so we decided to check it out. Poor Greg discovered that I am pretty much my mother as I chatted my way through two antique shops, an art gallery and introduced myself to the Leadville 100 founder who happened to be wandering around near the finish of a marathon they held yesterday. Then we drove up to I-70, stopping in Frisco long enough for me to fall wildly in love with it AND get my third Diet Coke of the day. Fourth if you count lunch but I think she may have given me Pepsi. We ate dinner in Denver and I dropped Greg off a respectable 13 hours after we set off.

There was an episode of This American Life recently that was all about road trips and the American desire for a road trip to spur some sort of adventure or ephiphany. My honest expectation for yesterday was to explore my new home a little bit and to take advantage of a three day weekend, but I have to admit maybe in the back of my head I was hoping for an adventure or an epiphany.

Colorado delivered on both counts. This will come as a shock to no one but I was controlling the iPod for most of the trip and at one point "Rocky Mountain High" cycled through. I have heard that song about a zillion times in my life-John Denver was a staple when my dad would play guitar with us as kids. But here we were, driving along through the Rocky Mountains, in a state that was never on my list, a year after one of the toughest stretches of my life and the lyrics reached right through the speakers and almost made me cry:

He was born in the summer of his 27th year
Comin' home to a place he'd never been before
He left yesterday behind him, you might say he was born again
You might say he found a key for every door

This is just how I feel about Colorado. I realize more and more as I get older how much Salt Lake is a part of me and I love it so much. California is the only home I really ever chose myself and will always be special, Boston is a place where I learned and grew more than I ever wanted to but it felt temporary from day one. Enter Colorado. I don't have any idea if I will live here forever, but for the first time in maybe my entire adult life, I am not thinking about the next move. I'm really, really happy here. Happy and settled in a way I haven't been in I don't know how long. I love seeing mountains every day as I drive home and knowing I get on one in about ten minutes if I want to. I love that people at work want to go for bike rides. I love that tonight we watched The Sandlot on the lawn and tomorrow there are ten places to go running that I've never seen before. We're coming up on the anniversary of that email from my friend saying, "there is this job in the Springs...are you at all interested?"

Best yes I ever said. I'll be John Denver would agree.

4th of July | Team USA

This is why I love my job.

4th of July Team USA