HB!

Yesterday was my sister Emily's birthday. I can still vividly remember the day she was born and I found out that I had a little sister. A sister! She could wear dresses and play ponies with me! I was so excited. Over the years I wasn't always the most awesome big sister and there were fights about not bugging me when my friends were over or ever ever ever touching my stuff that I suppose were normal but that I'm not particularly proud of now.

She turned out more then alright though and nowadays she's a person who constantly inspires me. Emily is one of the few people I have ever met who just really likes to be good. She has an amazing sense of style and can make every kind of space beautiful. She's brave and smart and adventurous and so much fun. I always love to introduce her to my friends because they inevitably fall for her. I feel so lucky to be related to her and I miss her pretty much every day.

Open Boxes

So if you have never used Pandora Radiothen I feel bad for you. It's a fantastic music website that lets you type in an artist you love and then it creates a radio station full of like sounding tunes. Nearly everytime I stream a Pandora station I walk away with some new treasure.

Yesterday I was doing that "25 Random Facts About Myself" that is going around the Facebook world and one of my facts was that I have Hall and Oates in my iPod right now and not in an ironic way. I genuinely like them. So today I decided-hmmm, I wonder what Pandora would give me on a Hall and Oates station...

A whole lotta awesome is what! Huey Lewis and the News! My favorite MJ tune "rock with you"! Steve Perry of Journey!! that I Ain't Missing You song whose artist I didn't know until today! Such a gentle walk down elementary school lane while I do my expense reports.

The highlight though was "In Too Deep" by Genesis. Many of you know that I have quite a healthy love for Phil Collins due mostly to his charming appearance on This American Life last year. But I had forgotten how much I love this song. The line "it seems I've spent too long only thinking about myself, now I want to spend my life just caring about someone else" has always been a favorite. Because yeah, that sounds pretty nice eh?

Sadly Phil seems to have nixed the video for this off of YouTube which is a shame. I admonish you to do yourself a favor and just buy it off iTunes. It's a dollar you guys.

Believe

I made just a couple of New Year's Resolutions this year. One of them was to commit to nightly spiritual study which I have not been great at the last few years. I decided that if I picked a specific topic to study I might stand a better chance of sticking to it and it turns out I was totally right. I guess technically it's only been a month but I haven't missed a single day. This month I have really been focused on faith and how to build and maintain it. It's funny how you can spend your whole life going to church and still have so. much. to learn. about something that seems so basic.

Today I was catching up on some friends and came across a quote on Christy's blog that tied in so well to what I've been studying.

"God is ready to present you with new opportunities. He wants to open new doors before you. It doesn't matter what’s happening in the world around you, in the economy, the housing industry, or with job reports; God’s Word still remains true. He rewards the people who seek after Him. He’s not the least bit concerned about how He’s going to supply your needs. There is no recession in heaven. He has His eye on you, and He still opens doors that no one can shut! In an instant, He can bring the right people into your life, the right opportunities, and the right resources to take you to a new level.
But in order to go to a higher level, you have to have a higher way of thinking. You can’t stay focused on what’s happening in the natural nor allow worry and fear to fill your thoughts. Remember, God’s ways are higher than our ways. He is working on our behalf behind the scenes in the supernatural realm. Choose to keep an attitude of faith and expectancy. As you do, you’ll move forward through the open doors of blessing God has prepared for you."

I have let the constant chatter about the failing economy really get to me the last few months and I feel like there's a little black cloud sitting over my head. I love the idea that there is "no recession in heaven". It has always been way to easy for me to look at my trials like giant, insurmountable mountains sitting right in front of me and to forget that keeping up a relationship with God is kind of silly if you don't believe He knows a way over that hill that I simply can't see. It's a lesson I really ought to have learned by now since it's been true over and over and OVER in my life. I'm working my tail off to make it stick!

Home again Home again

Is there a better feeling on earth then being in your bed after an extended period away?

I submit that there is not.

Amber Waves

Last night I was trying to find an english speaking channel in my Spanish hotel and had to settle for British news. It was pretty bleak stuff-bad economy, politicians no one trusts, job loss. The stuff that you can't miss these days if you do things like turn on the TV, read a newspaper or spend any time on the internet. I've been feeling some of my own personal turmoil the last few months and it certainly hasn't helped my state of mind to have doom and gloom be the order of the day no matter where you look.

Right now, watching the President and First Lady walk down a Pennsylvania Avenue absolutely teeming with excited people I can't help but think that maybe it's OK to feel some of that hope President Obama has been pushing the last few years. As I listened to his speech today, I felt like he really gets the fears and worries that are weighing so heavily on so many of us. He was reassuring, but he made it clear that we all have a responsibility to make it better. That we will need to be patient and we will need to work together. Instead of saying, "don't worry guys, I'll fix this," he invited us to step up and be the kind of Americans lots of us have only read about in text books. This country has certainly been through worrisome times before but the key is that we always pick up, dust off, and carry on. I feel inspired. I feel motivated. I feel responsible to help.

Yes we will Mr. President.

Icy

Despite 40 minutes of shoveling this morning I couldn't get my car up the hill and out of my driveway to church so I'm enjoying an unexpected snow day. I listened to a few talks from General Conference so that I didn't miss out on my spiritual fix entirely and now I've got one of the greatest movies of all time going while I finish my packing. And what movie is that you ask?

The Cutting Edge.

That's right, the one with the Olympic Figure Skater who can't get along with any of her partners and ends up skating with an injured hockey player trying to salvage some sort of ice career and they fight fight fight until they fall in love.

The plot is totally ludicrous of course but I never get tired of this movie. It's got an underdog sports theme, great chemistry between the leads and and just enough Olympic talk to make me feel nostalgic. And I know I'm not alone-you can ask 10 girls about this movie and 7 will tell you they love it.

Toepick!

Parked

I'm supposed to be packing for a week at a trade show and sales launch so of course I spent an hour wondering around Target and now I'm watching this week's 30 Rock and playing on the computer instead of packing. I don't know what it is about loading up a suitcase that puts me into total avoidance mode but I just hate it.

In other news, I was making a CD for a friend this week which usually means serious rooting through my music collection and tripping down memory lane. I came upon this little gem by Broken Social Scene. It took me back to a sweet middle of the night cross country telephone conversation in a New York city hotel room a few years ago. A conversation that was incredibly surprising at the time and is a good reminder that I don't always know how life is going to turn out. My worst fears so rarely come to pass. Thanks song. I needed that.

Zero

It's really cold in Boston right now. Like wear your slippers to bed even though the heat is on because you are frozen to the bone kind of cold.

It's sucking all the creative outta me. I'm looking for it though.

Check Up

I went to a chick flick last night with a bunch of married ladies. My friend Brooke had invited me to tag along with some of her friends from church and we had a lot of fun. The movie was not that great but one of the main characters got me thinking about something I'm trying to explore a little more.

It was a movie about two women living in New York and one was this really high powered attorney with a fabulous apartment and a drool-worthy wardrobe. I found myself thinking-oooo, someday I'd really like to dress that way. And then I realized-um, that women and I are in the same life stage right now. When exactly is it that I'm planning to morph into a twenty eight year old fashionista? I'm 32 years old. I might feel like I'm still 25 and that I'm not a real adult yet but as far as the world is concerned, lady, you're a grown up. This is what you are like. The ways you choose to spend your time and money and energy right now? You are set in those ways. And frankly that's just fine. But I've been a little concerned over the last year at how often I catch myself saying, "that's something I'll do someday." It's so easy for someday to slip into yesterday and then get lost. I think I am guilty of something I have always railed against-waiting for some "real" life to begin. The one where I am braver, the one where I don't worry so much, the one where I get to bed at a reasonable hour. One day I will have faith figured out and one day I will make better decisions. I feel like maybe I have lost a few years of my life because I'm just hoping a new me will show up and replace the one I'm frustrated with.

So today I bought fresh flowers for the house for no reason. Because I've always wanted to be that girl.

Here's a song that fits kinda perfectly...

Teeth

I was so worried when I went to Utah that Morgan was going to think I was some kind of creepy stranger and wouldn't want to play with me.

So I was completely overjoyed when I saw the little weasel the first day and he broke out into a giant grin. And every other time I saw him he would look at me for a few seconds, study my face until I almost couldn't handle it and then he'd let me have a little of this


And now I kind of can't believe it'll be six months before I see that again...

Tally Ho

I guess I should have known better then to post my song off with Dainon the day before I left on vacation because it's taken me over two weeks to figure out the results.

It was a nailbiter guys! Early returns really had my song in the lead but Dainon got a late surge and beat me fair and square 16 to 18. My hats off to Dainon-he posted a great song and I think Jesus and the Mary Chain would probably be OK going down to Jeff Buckley.

I thought I would share what my second choice was for a song in the competition.

This is the theme from Rocky "Gonna Fly Now" that I originally downloaded just for my running mix. But over time my appreciation for it's musical merits has really grown. Yes, we all hear it and see Rocky so there is an emotional aspect to it but I think this is one of those pieces that does exactly what it's supposed to do. Not a listen goes by that I don't feel like a complete badass. I'm either the greatest cyclist of all time, the best jogger in the park or the most amazing floor mopper ever. I love this song.



If anyone else wants to play just let me know! I love this stuff!

Echo

A pretty glorious holiday break will come to an end in a few hours. I had such a wonderful time in Utah-truly one of my best trips home in a long time. I didn't get to spend quite enough time with everyone but that is always an issue when you don't live in a place anymore. That said, I got lots of opportunities to hang out with both of my parents and to load up on their good advice, I held Morgan as often as I possibly could and tried to overdose on his soul-melting little smile, I caught up with friends I haven't seen in years and years and did as much laughing as a person needs to do in two weeks. I am more convinced then ever that I am pretty much the luckiest sister on earth to have the siblings and the in-laws that I am blessed with. It was a perfect way to end what was just a flat out weird year.

As I was thinking about 2009 and what I want to do with it I was doing a little archive diving and ran across this post from January 2007.

Is that me talking? It's really funny/weird/lame/oddly comforting how one year you can feel like you have life ALL FIGURED OUT and then two years later you are sort of shaking your head at some of your decisions. I will admit I felt a little bit sad reading that because it makes me feel like a backslider. And yet, this break was a perfect reminder that even when I am not feeling 100% my best, I have a whole network of wonderful people and that loving and being loved is honestly the very best blessing a person could ask for. I have had some good time to think and plan and even act a little bit and instead of being bummed out, I'm pretty hopeful about the next 12 months. That girl who wrote that sunny little post was me after all right?

Happy 2009 everyone. I feel like it's gonna be a good one!

Correct

I am back in Boston. After two weeks of trying to cram in all the friend/family/Morgan time I possible could it felt a bit lonely to come home to an empty apartment last night. I'm at my office today and it's dark and quiet as well. Hard not to feel a bit meloncholy I 'spose.

Maybe one of the reasons I like music so much is because it does a great job of picking you up out of a somber mood. This has been my drug of choice today.

Begin

I'm headed back to Boston right now and was looking through my photos of the New Year's Party last night. Apparently I get around.