Dear skate boy who works in my office,
First of all, I'm really sorry that I thought you were an intern or something and didn't pay more attention to you. Imagine my surprise at Sales Meeting when they introduced you as the NSS designer. You'll have to excuse me-after spending the last four years working almost exclusively with women and middle aged male sales reps, I just didn't know how to react to someone in the office under the age of 45 with no wedding ring and great hair.
You may have noticed that I have gone from just saying "hi" and passing you by in the hall, to stuttering and being unable to form complete sentences around you. This is entirely your fault and I attribute it mainly to the afternoon you decided to take your shirt off and jump in the swimming pool. Although it's summer and I live by the beach, I had forgotten that male abs could look like that. Also, did you really need to bring your skateboard in and do tricks for us at the product fair?
I know you have a girlfriend and frankly, I've had my fill of dating coworkers, but I would really appreciate it if you could just indulge my twitchiness when you walk into a room as it's been a long, long time since I've had an acceptable work crush. You can't really count that guy in Boston who worked next door and who I never actually spoke to.
the marketing girl